livendive 8 #26 October 11, 2006 QuoteI went to the experts at http://www.cheaters.com and, following a link, found THE definition of cheating, i.e., infidelity: Quote As explained by Then (1999), regardless of their religious orientation, most people agree and understand that marriage vows implicitly and explicitly include a promise of “forsaking all others” (p. 4). When this promise is broken, infidelity has occurred in a marriage. Permission has nothing to do with it. Walt According to that definition, only married people can "cheat". However, a couple paragraphs further down the page, the definition of infidelity is expanded as follows: QuoteThe bottom line is that upon establishment of a committed relationship, “if there is a secret sexual and/or romantic involvement outside of the relationship, it is experienced as infidelity” (Lusterman, 1998, p. 18). Please note the word "secret". It's kinda important to this discussion. Blues, Dave"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #27 October 11, 2006 QuoteAccording to that definition, only married people can "cheat". However, a couple paragraphs further down the page, the definition of infidelity is expanded as follows: QuoteThe bottom line is that upon establishment of a committed relationship, “if there is a secret sexual and/or romantic involvement outside of the relationship, it is experienced as infidelity” (Lusterman, 1998, p. 18). Please note the word "secret". It's kinda important to this discussion. Blues, Dave Ok, I admit it--I was hoping you wouldn't follow the link and see that. Apparently not even the people who study cheating/infidelity can agree on the definition. I prefer to think of cheating as adultery or more generally having sex outside of a mutually-agreed upon monogamous relationship, because it's a lot easier to pin down. IMO, a marriage in which both partners agree that they can have sex with others is not really a marriage other than on paper. Your marriage may vary. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #28 October 12, 2006 Depends on the relationship. I actually encouraged several past girlfriends to keep a girlfriend on the side if it was a situation where I couldn’t be around much. It wasn’t an I wanted to join, watch or anything else. In those situations, I knew I wouldn’t be around as much as I would like to be and wouldn’t be as threatened or insecure about a GirlFriend even if they were sleeping together. The only thing I asked was don’t hide it from me. No matter what, If you feel that you must hide something from your SO.. Then at some level it is cheating. Also I think that if she is truly Bi (not just a girl that plays Bi for attention) there are needs beyond sex that she will only find fulfilled by another woman. It actually takes stress off the relationship. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
valjumps46 0 #29 October 12, 2006 NO!"I'm going to marry my novels and have short stories for children." BLuE sKiES & aPpLE PIeS oh and I'm "M" A-ZIng Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
windcatcher 0 #30 October 12, 2006 QuoteCheating doesn't mean infidelity Did you seriously just type that? Mother to the cutest little thing in the world... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
livendive 8 #31 October 12, 2006 QuoteQuoteCheating doesn't mean infidelity Did you seriously just type that? Did you ever cheat while playing hide-n-seek? Blues, Dave"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #32 October 12, 2006 QuoteNO! Uh, NO what? Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carpediem 0 #33 October 12, 2006 If she didn't mention a thing about it, then just did it without inviting... well i'd be pissed. But before ya giver the ole boot, I don't cheat on the cheater for payback, the last round in the bedroom would def have the ole not-so-lubed "whoopsy daisy" and it wouldn't be just the head. Those who do, can't explain. Those who don't, can't understand. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kelel01 1 #34 October 12, 2006 That just made my asshole hurt. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,110 #35 October 12, 2006 >IMO, a marriage in which both partners agree that they can have sex with >others is not really a marriage other than on paper. Personally, I think a marriage where two people are obeying the letter of the law, a law they didn't agree on initially, and driving each other batshit in the meantime, is truly a marriage on paper only. A marriage where two people respect each other's wishes, and make the other person (and their values) the most important thing in their lives, is more a real marriage - no matter what they do with other people. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carpediem 0 #36 October 12, 2006 mmmm a tighty.... How you doin'? Those who do, can't explain. Those who don't, can't understand. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Conundrum 1 #37 October 12, 2006 Absolutely it is. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
livendive 8 #38 October 12, 2006 QuoteThat just made my asshole hurt. I'm torn between saying, "Well thenh don't cheat on CarpeDiam...problem solved" and "C'mere, I can apply a healing salve." Blues, Daver"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pia 0 #39 October 12, 2006 QuoteIn my book - Lying about fooling around with _anyone_ is cheating, no matter what sex the other person is. If you are honest about it, then it's not cheating - again, no matter what sex. I 2nd that..**Those who refuse to live and learn simply exist** Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Erroll 80 #40 October 12, 2006 QuoteAny man who has more than one wife must be some sort of glutton for punishment. Yup. Just for starters, he will have more than one mother-in-law. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warpedskydiver 0 #41 October 12, 2006 It isn't cheating if I banged her first. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dploi 0 #42 October 21, 2006 Not if you get pics... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrGuy 0 #43 October 21, 2006 I wondered when the first photos would appear in this thread.... One thing though: Why the hell do decent looking girls put metal shit in their lips?? So ugly, and a complete turnoff for me. just my opinion...but of course, I'm correct. About the cheating: As long as she doesn't turn competely the other way, I think there is nothing wrong with a girl occasionally playing with a girlfriend. very hot. any guy who doesn't think so, is lying. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #45 October 22, 2006 Quote One thing though: Why the hell do decent looking girls put metal shit in their lips?? So ugly, and a complete turnoff for me. just my opinion...but of course, I'm correct. QuoteI like it, you obviously have little or no taste what so everYou are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites matt1215 0 #46 October 22, 2006 QuoteWhy the hell do decent looking girls put metal shit in their lips?? They make great bite points. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skymedic 0 #47 October 22, 2006 QuoteWhy the hell do decent looking girls put metal shit in their lips?? So ugly, and a complete turnoff I personaly think it is sexy as hell....but of course your opinion is probably the only right one right?? Marc otherwise known as Mr.Fallinwoman.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Mike111 0 #48 October 22, 2006 I agree... i guess it would depend on hos serious one is... if they really love each other then doing another gil to whatever extend would be a little uneasy but if it was a casual relationship i guess I wouldn;t really be that bothered. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Andy_Copland 0 #49 October 22, 2006 Only if they dont ask their instructor first, they could get seriously hurt or even worse die.1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Mike111 0 #50 October 22, 2006 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 Next Page 2 of 2 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
matt1215 0 #46 October 22, 2006 QuoteWhy the hell do decent looking girls put metal shit in their lips?? They make great bite points. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymedic 0 #47 October 22, 2006 QuoteWhy the hell do decent looking girls put metal shit in their lips?? So ugly, and a complete turnoff I personaly think it is sexy as hell....but of course your opinion is probably the only right one right?? Marc otherwise known as Mr.Fallinwoman.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mike111 0 #48 October 22, 2006 I agree... i guess it would depend on hos serious one is... if they really love each other then doing another gil to whatever extend would be a little uneasy but if it was a casual relationship i guess I wouldn;t really be that bothered. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #49 October 22, 2006 Only if they dont ask their instructor first, they could get seriously hurt or even worse die.1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
