if noah came to the usa in 2006.....

[D22369 0]

In the year 2006 , the Lord came unto Noah, who was
now living in the United States, and said, "Once
again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated,
and I see the end of all flesh before me.

Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing a
long with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6
months to build the Ark before I will start the
unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah
weeping in his yard - but no Ark.

"Noah!" He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where
is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have
changed. I needed a building permit. I've been arguing
with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler
system. My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning
laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height
limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a
decision.

Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond
be posted for the future costs of moving power lines
and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage
for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the
sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing
of it.

Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local
trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the
environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!

When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights
group sued me.

They insisted that I was confining wild animals
against their will. They argued the accommodation was
too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put
so many animals in a confined space.

Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until
they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.

I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human
Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed
to hire for my building crew.

Immigration and Naturalization is checking the
green-card status of most of the people who want to
work.

The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist
I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience.

To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets,
claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally
with endangered species.

So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10
years for me to finish this Ark."

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine,
and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up
in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to
destroy the world?"

"No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."

They say I suffer from insanity.... But I actually enjoy it.

[bloody_trauma 2]

nw i'm not religious at all, and i know its a joke, but didn't "god" give "noah" the rainbow as a promise that he would never flood the earth again?

Fly it like you stole it

[D22369 0]

how would I know?.... my favorite religion involves the sacrifice of virgins

(and they dont get tossed into a volcano)


Roy

They say I suffer from insanity.... But I actually enjoy it.

[FlyinDawg 0]

Quote

nw i'm not religious at all, and i know its a joke, but didn't "god" give "noah" the rainbow as a promise that he would never flood the earth again?

That's right, rainbow is by God's Promise, He wouldn't never flood the Earth again. Story about Noah in Bible Genesis 8:20-9:17

Flyin' Dawg or SkyDog


"To understand is to forgive, even oneself."

[bloody_trauma 2]

yay i win bible trivia! does this mean im not going to "hell"?

Fly it like you stole it

[Squeak 17]

Quote

yay i win bible trivia! does this mean im not going to "hell"?

No you are going to hel for GLOATING
Also you can't win when you ask the question

You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky)
My Life ROCKS!
How's yours doing?