Cell Phones for Children

[NewGuy2005 53]

Should a 12 year old child have a cell phone? I'm not talking about the kind that only calls 3 or 4 numbers.

I've got two 12 year old girls that want phones. They do not need them. They are rarely out of the sight of either my wife or myself. However, they want them.

My old school sensibilities say no way. What do you think?

[Gawain 0]

If they earn their own money (allowance, babysitting, etc), get them a pre-paid device and make them pay for it (after the first month's "gift")...that's one option.

So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh
Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright
'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life
Make light!

[LisaM 0]

My son will probably get his first cell phone at age 11. But, we don't have a land line so a cell is a must when he starts staying home alone.

Course, with 12 yo girls, a prepaid is probably a must! Or an 8billion whenever minute plan!

~ Lisa
~ Do you Rigminder?

[skymama 37]

I'm a meanie, my kids had to wait until they were older. They had access to the landline in the house whenever they wanted and just like at your house, they were hardly ever away from some kind of adult supervision at that age so I didn't see why they needed one.

I'm not a big fan of giving kids the latest gadget just because all the other kids have them and I'm always talking to them about want vs. need. My daughter got her phone when she started driving and my son got his when he started needing pick-up rides for soccer and refereeing. I'm probably not the norm though, I made my son wait until he was about 10 before he got a gaming system.

She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man,
because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon

[littleskycrab 0]

Here is what I did, it may or may not be helpful to you.

When my daughter was 12, i got her a Virgin Mobile prepaid phone. I would add $20.00 to it when it was time to add $$, however if her attitude, chores or grades weren't up to par - I wouldn't add $$ until they were. She was given the instruction that her friends are not to call her phone, nor was she to call her friends - we have other phones for that.

She has done a great job and now, 3 years later, she has asked for a non-prepaid phone. She will turn 15 in 2 weeks and I will get her a Metro PCS phone. She can sit & talk on that thing all day if she wishes - there are no minutes or contracts. If she gets in trouble - I simply don't pay for the next months service. No penalties, no catch.

I personally don't think she needs it, except when she is away from home, but it's either the "regular" cell phone or a MySpace page and hell will freeze over before I let her have a page on that site.

I hope this helps you to make a decision. It has worked very well for my family. Good luck!

Next time a sunrise steals your breath or a meadow of flowers leaves you speechless, remain that way. Say nothing and listen as heaven whispers, "Do you like it? I did it just for you."

[NewGuy2005 53]

Excellent advise. Thanks all.

[somethinelse 0]

yeah,
I can sympathize. My 11 year old wants one too.
I'd like her to be able to reach me when she needs me,
Plus I know that she's getting to the age where sometimes its just the ability to have privacy and freedom to have the conversations alone sometimes and I respect that...

But I haven't figured out exactly how to grant that with a cell phone yet. Maybe one of those with prepaid minutes, and allott her so many minutes each month...?

[MikeJD 0]

From your thread title I thought this seemed like a pretty good deal. But then I realised that I don't have any children to trade.

[shropshire 0]

<> - Sounds like a fair exchange to me... where do I sign up?

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[shropshire 0]

Beat me too it

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[NewGuy2005 53]

You guys must not have kids if you think that's a fair trade.

[Fast 0]

Reading this, I am wondering if I am just time distorted or what, but I remember being out of sight of my parents a lot when I was 12-13 ish and I had a pretty over protective mother. Maybe times have just changed. Or maybe I am remembering wrong but I know I had quite a bit of free reign compared to what I think parents give today pre-car days.

~D
Where troubles melt like lemon drops Away above the chimney tops That's where you'll find me.
Swooping is taking one last poke at the bear before escaping it's cave - davelepka

[lisamariewillbe 1]

Quote

Maybe times have just changed.

Yes they have.

Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this
Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this

[Fast 0]

Quote

Quote

Maybe times have just changed.

Yes they have.

I'm only 24... It can't have changed that much!

~D
Where troubles melt like lemon drops Away above the chimney tops That's where you'll find me.
Swooping is taking one last poke at the bear before escaping it's cave - davelepka

[Bolas 5]

We had a very scientific method for me being unsupervised: If I was playing outside I had to be able to hear my mom yell out the door to come home. Sometimes she'd call me and I was allowed to go back out. If I went in someone's house I had to call.

Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting
If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh.

[lisamariewillbe 1]

Quote

I'm only 24... It can't have changed that much!

Really? How many registered sexual predators did you live next to as a child? How many knocked up 13 year olds did you know? How many drugs were you offered at 10 yrs old? Times have changed, once you become a parent you will see that.

Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this
Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this

[Slappie 9]

Quote

Reading this, I am wondering if I am just time distorted or what, but I remember being out of sight of my parents a lot when I was 12-13 ish and I had a pretty over protective mother. Maybe times have just changed. Or maybe I am remembering wrong but I know I had quite a bit of free reign compared to what I think parents give today pre-car days.

When I was 12-13 I was hardly ever home. I was out of sight all the time. Riding my bike very long distances to visit friends. I will say I had to always stay in touch via a phone call so she knew I wasn't laid up dead somewhere.

As for 12yr olds with cell phones. If they've got valid reasons to have them. Maybe if they were to make their own money to pay for the minutes. I've got a 10yo boy he has no need for a cell phone. He may want one and he's had a lil gf that her parents gave her one at 11. But he's not getting one until he can show me a legitimate reason he needs one. Then we'd discuss minutes and whos paying for them.

"Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them."

[misskriss 0]

My 12 year old has one. I think it's great and it's useful for me. True she isn't out of my sight much but it's amazing how handy it is when she is gone. She calls me when basketball practice is over or when she's at sleepovers with friends. She goes to the dz a lot too with my husband and she always calls me from there. If we're at the mall and she goes off with her friends we can keep in touch as to where exactly she is. It's not about being a gadget and I know I survived without one as a kid but I think this is good technology. We're all on a family plan with tmobile and it's great. We never go over our minutes and that's with three girls. My 14 year old sleeps on the third floor and instead of yelling for her or running up three flights of stairs with the baby I will call her on her cell phone to come down..

[misskriss 0]

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Really? How many registered sexual predators did you live next to as a child?

I'm thinking just as many... difference being today we can look it up online and see exactly where they live.

[Douva 0]

Quote

Quote

I'm only 24... It can't have changed that much!

Really? How many registered sexual predators did you live next to as a child? How many knocked up 13 year olds did you know? How many drugs were you offered at 10 yrs old? Times have changed, once you become a parent you will see that.

No, times have not changed that much. What you've seen since you became a parent is the change in the way these incidents are recorded by law enforcement agencies and reported by the news media. Newspapers now have to compete with not only television but also the Internet. Network news has evolved from a lost leader (not required to make a profit) to a major source of revenue for the television networks. It's all about ratings, and as the saying goes, "If it bleeds, it leads." Sex, drugs, and violence sell, just like they always have. The difference is that in the past, our news outlets weren't trying to sell us anything.

Despite the scare tactics used by child advocacy groups seeking funding, your children are statistically no more likely to be kidnapped by a stranger than they were fifty years ago. You still have a better chance of winning the lottery than of losing a child to an abduction by a stranger. Take a wild guess--How many children would you estimate are kidnapped by strangers in the U.S. each year?

As for drugs and sex, those may be more prevalent, but that doesn't mean they haven't always been around. Just as parents in the past did, parents today must learn to train their children the best they can and, beyond that, trust their kids to heed those lessons.

I don't have an M.D. or a law degree. I have bachelor's in kicking ass and taking names.