Managment Gurus - dont open this if you're easily offended!!

[shropshire 0]

How do you deal with those pedantic, irritating little tits that say stuff like...

What does good look like
What's the Blue sky option
Take a helicopter view
Think outside the box

Anyway, I think i pissed one off today... I was explaining some work that I'd done and IT said... "There's no I in team Tony"
To which I replied... yeah but there is a U [You] in Cunt!!

.

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[Lindercles 0]

There are two kinds of people, sheep and sharks. It's time to shift some paradigms, take the bull by the horns, and eschew obfuscation.

[shropshire 0]

grrrrrrr

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[quade 4]

Quote

How do you deal with those pedantic, irritating little tits that say stuff like...

What does good look like
What's the Blue sky option
Take a helicopter view
Think outside the box

Anyway, I think i pissed one off today... I was explaining some work that I'd done and IT said... "There's no I in team Tony"
To which I replied... yeah but there is a You in Cunt!!

.

There is a financial v.p. in a company I'm working with right now that LOVES football analogies, roots for the Packers, the whole nine yards . . .

Anyway, one day I asked him if he ever actually played the game. His reply, "no."

I find it hysterical to hear people talking about "team work" that have never actually been on any sort of "team". A lot of the time what they REALLY mean is, "help me achieve MY goals" rather than "help US achieve OUR goals."

Those people are idiots.

So, to answer your question, when this guy is talking about;

What's the Blue sky option
Take a helicopter view
Think outside the box

Start dropping skydiving metaphors.

The BLUE SKY option? Start talking about cloud clearances and punching clouds.

The helicopter view? I can see where you're going, I'm above that, lemme just bail.

Think outside the box? Hell dude, I'm already outside the freekin' airplane!

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

[Andy_Copland 0]

Theres no "I" in Team but there is an "I" in pie. Theres an "I" in meat pie, meat being an anagram of team... i dont know what the hell he's on about.


Fuck i love that film, sorry Tony

1338

People aint made of nothin' but water and shit.

Until morale improves, the beatings will continue.

[gremlin 0]

"There is no I in team"

Retort A
" but there is a me "

Retort B
"and there is no f in way"

I'm drunk, you're drunk, lets go back to mine....

[Zep 0]

I don't envy you, I was never a team player, I will bounce ideas off my boss knowing that they will eventually be his idea
so when the shit hits the fan it was his idea

Gone fishing

[normiss 892]

there ain't no "we" in it either....

[PhreeZone 20]

I love the one "What color is your parachute" I replied "Blue with one white cell offset, the previous one was white, blue and black. Before that it was Yellow and Navy."

Yesterday is history
And tomorrow is a mystery

Parachutemanuals.com

[jarrodh 0]

I had a philosophy teacher in high school who was the best teacher i ever had. He would skip class more than his students and give radically inflated grades to everyone that bought the book he wrote.

One thing he absolutely fucking hated was when people, particualrly his superiors, would say shit like "try and think outside of the box". He said anyone thats says stupid shit like "try and think outside of the box" are so far in the box that they dont know what the outside even looks like.

A few of his students wrote that line in essays for his classes in an effort to describe philosophers as people "who think outside of the box"! He went off on those kids screaming shit like "get the fuck out of this class you fucking moron" while banging a stick. It was awesome particularly when he said it to some quiet shy teenage girl or some big ass football player who thought he was hot shit.

To sum it all up: THose one liners like outside, of the box, and there is no "I" in team are just filler because those managers are to incompetent to come up with some actual motivational strategies for their employees so they use lines they probably got out of "Management for Dummies".

2 BITS....4 BITS....6 BITS....A DOLLAR!....ALL FOR THE GATORS....STAND UP AND HOLLER!!!!

[shropshire 0]

These people generally do not produce anything but seem to get on by playing the game.. I hate them to the very marrow of the souless body!!

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[jcd11235 0]

Quote

I had a philosophy teacher in high school who was the best teacher i ever had. He would skip class more than his students and give radically inflated grades to everyone that bought the book he wrote.

Admirable attributes in any quality educator.

Math tutoring available. Only $6! per hour! First lesson: Factorials!

[Skyrad 0]

Quote

How do you deal with those pedantic, irritating little tits that say stuff like...

What does good look like
What's the Blue sky option
Take a helicopter view
Think outside the box

Anyway, I think i pissed one off today... I was explaining some work that I'd done and IT said... "There's no I in team Tony"
To which I replied... yeah but there is a U [You] in Cunt!!

.

ROFLMAO Thats fantastic!

When an author is too meticulous about his style, you may presume that his mind is frivolous and his content flimsy.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca

[Skyrad 0]

Quote

I love the one "What color is your parachute" I replied "Blue with one white cell offset, the previous one was white, blue and black. Before that it was Yellow and Navy."

I wish somone would ask me that at work

When an author is too meticulous about his style, you may presume that his mind is frivolous and his content flimsy.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca

[Skyrad 0]

Quote

Quote

I had a philosophy teacher in high school who was the best teacher i ever had. He would skip class more than his students and give radically inflated grades to everyone that bought the book he wrote.

Admirable attributes in any quality educator.

Seeing as this thread isn't about the standars of educators I think we should 'Park this one in the carpark' and maybe 'Take it offline' then if you want to start a thread about it we can 'hit all the relevant parties' who can then 'get all their piggies in a row' and do 'a little brainstorming session' followed by a 'deep dive session' hows that sound to you?

When an author is too meticulous about his style, you may presume that his mind is frivolous and his content flimsy.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca

[shropshire 0]

C**NT

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[freekflyguy 0]

TEAM

Together
Everyone
Achieves
More

It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.

[shropshire 0]

Vomit

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[AlexCrowley 0]

There is no "I" in team but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Meat is the anagram of team.

TV's got them images, TV's got them all, nothing's shocking.

[slug 1]

Quote

TEAM

Together
Everyone
Achieves
More

Hi buzz

That crap works on virgins. Aren't you part of your DZ family, a DZ team player, and a member of the skydiving brother hood?

The team concept varies greatly from DZ to DZ for various reasons. Just got to find the right DZ with the right vibes. And you will achieve more.

Wrong DZ, established clique wrong gender, connections, different management style, priorities unrealistic expectations, . Whatever, nothing personel business is business you can always do solo's or jump somewhere else.

FWIW I've never actually seen the "wrong DZ" might be a urban legend.

R.I.P.

R.I.P.