Showering...Them vs. "Us"

[airtwardo 7]

Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you
see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make
mental note to do : more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.





Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her while making the woo-woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off - Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo
sound again.

Throw wet towel on her pillow.

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[swedishcelt 0]

Reposted several times. I am not even PART of the repost police and I know that.

Just the same it's funny.

[shropshire 0]

I've just been upstairs and can not find the camera that you have clearly had installed in my bathroom

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[airtwardo 7]

Quote

Reposted several times. I am not even PART of the repost police and I know that.

Just the same it's funny.

Yeah but YOU spend entirely TOOOOOO much time reading EVERY THREAD!


...and what kind of teacher doesnt know...reposted isn't even a WORD!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[swedishcelt 0]

It is a word. New computer related jargon is now starting to be included in the dictionary.
So there!!!

I don't read every thread. I do tend to read the one's that say 'shower' in them though...

[slug 1]

Hi twardo

I stay out of the bosses bathroom and she stays out of her ISO's bathroom.

We get along just fine as far as I know. except when I wanna make her nervous and leave her toilet seat up.

If thats a repost "foget about it"
R.I.P.

[lisamariewillbe 1]

Quote

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo
sound again.

Funny cause its true...

Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this
Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this

[billeisele 130]

where does, "she grabs weiner and walks hubby to shower" fit in?

Give one city to the thugs so they can all live together. I vote for Chicago where they have strict gun laws.

[steve1 5]

This is really funny, but at the same time, it sounds just like home....Steve1