waltappel 1 #1 January 2, 2007 ...as anything I've ever posted and better than most. It's been a while since I've posted any accounts of some of my more bizarre experiences but a friend sent me an account of one of his experiences and it is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too good not to share, so for your reading pleasure, here it is. And yes, I've got friends who are every bit as twisted as I am! Walt Quote We pulled into Oranjestad, Aruba after several grueling (boring) days sailing around the Carribean. Oranjestad is a tourist town with clubs, casinos, and nice shop. Being sailor, we preferred something a little more seedy, and we found this at the other end of the island in a town called Sint Nicolaas. Sint Nicolaas was where the cargo and oil ships docked and it held a plethora of taverns that suited our needs. Most of the drinking establishments there were also whore-houses. This was quite convenient. I was in one such place drinking beer with my buddies when I was approached by an Aruban prostitute. “You come with me, my pussy tastes like honey”, she said in her accent. I politely declined explaining that I wasn’t going to eat her pussy, but I would be happy to use her services after I wind down with a few beers. She told me “I lick your ass, $20”. One of the guys next to me at the bar said “I’ll give you $20 if you need it, but you gotta go!” Now I need to break off from the story for a bit and tell you about Norm. Norm was a nice guy, but he had one weakness. He just had to eat pussy. It didn’t matter that most of the women he slept with were hookers, he just couldn’t help himself. We gave him a lot of shit over this and he took it like a man, knowing he deserved it. The lady of that evening led me back to a bedroom, where she obviously lived, and she quickly got naked and began fooling around with me. She then got up, grabbed a bottle of honey and drizzled it on her snatch. She says “you eat my pussy, it tastes like honey.” I had never seen anything like this before and almost laughed at her, but I help my composure and again politely declined. she has me lay on my back and crawls between my legs. Before I had a chance to wonder what was going to happen next, she pushed my legs back and began eating my hairy asshole. At this point, I’m remembering that just before leaving the ship, I took a huge dump. She must have figured this out because after about 30 seconds, she stopped, put a condom on her tongue and continued. We then finished our business deal and I paid her a few extra dollars and returned to the bar. Of coarse the guys wanted to know if she really ate my ass and as I was telling them about it, we notice something across the bar. Butt-licker was talking to none other than out friend Norm. As they disappeared into the back, I relayed the recent events to the guys at the bar. There was a lot of hooting and hollering and the drinks were flowing when eventually Norm returns with a sheepish grin. We all knew what went on back there, but I had to ask Norm a couple questions. “Did you eat her pussy?” “Of course I did, she poured honey on it. I couldn’t help it” was his reply. “Norm” I said inquisitively, “did you kiss her?” “Well yeah of course”. The place fucking erupted. From then on, I would occasionally ask him “how’s my ass taste”, to which he would rely, being the good sport that he is, “same as usual.” Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #2 January 2, 2007 Walt..... Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stitch 0 #3 January 2, 2007 MUST.....RESIST.....URGE.....TO VOMIT. "No cookies for you"- GFD "I don't think I like the sound of that" ~ MB65 Don't be a "Racer Hater" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jarrodh 0 #4 January 2, 2007 I think I might be as messed up as you since im I cant stop laughing my ass of. Keep the stories coming.2 BITS....4 BITS....6 BITS....A DOLLAR!....ALL FOR THE GATORS....STAND UP AND HOLLER!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
akarunway 1 #5 January 2, 2007 Quote...as anything I've ever posted and better than most. It's been a while since I've posted any accounts of some of my more bizarre experiences but a friend sent me an account of one of his experiences and it is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too good not to share, so for your reading pleasure, here it is. And yes, I've got friends who are every bit as twisted as I am! Walt Quote We pulled into Oranjestad, Aruba after several grueling (boring) days sailing around the Carribean. Oranjestad is a tourist town with clubs, casinos, and nice shop. Being sailor, we preferred something a little more seedy, and we found this at the other end of the island in a town called Sint Nicolaas. Sint Nicolaas was where the cargo and oil ships docked and it held a plethora of taverns that suited our needs. Most of the drinking establishments there were also whore-houses. This was quite convenient. I was in one such place drinking beer with my buddies when I was approached by an Aruban prostitute. “You come with me, my pussy tastes like honey”, she said in her accent. I politely declined explaining that I wasn’t going to eat her pussy, but I would be happy to use her services after I wind down with a few beers. She told me “I lick your ass, $20”. One of the guys next to me at the bar said “I’ll give you $20 if you need it, but you gotta go!” Now I need to break off from the story for a bit and tell you about Norm. Norm was a nice guy, but he had one weakness. He just had to eat pussy. It didn’t matter that most of the women he slept with were hookers, he just couldn’t help himself. We gave him a lot of shit over this and he took it like a man, knowing he deserved it. The lady of that evening led me back to a bedroom, where she obviously lived, and she quickly got naked and began fooling around with me. She then got up, grabbed a bottle of honey and drizzled it on her snatch. She says “you eat my pussy, it tastes like honey.” I had never seen anything like this before and almost laughed at her, but I help my composure and again politely declined. she has me lay on my back and crawls between my legs. Before I had a chance to wonder what was going to happen next, she pushed my legs back and began eating my hairy asshole. At this point, I’m remembering that just before leaving the ship, I took a huge dump. She must have figured this out because after about 30 seconds, she stopped, put a condom on her tongue and continued. We then finished our business deal and I paid her a few extra dollars and returned to the bar. Of coarse the guys wanted to know if she really ate my ass and as I was telling them about it, we notice something across the bar. Butt-licker was talking to none other than out friend Norm. As they disappeared into the back, I relayed the recent events to the guys at the bar. There was a lot of hooting and hollering and the drinks were flowing when eventually Norm returns with a sheepish grin. We all knew what went on back there, but I had to ask Norm a couple questions. “Did you eat her pussy?” “Of course I did, she poured honey on it. I couldn’t help it” was his reply. “Norm” I said inquisitively, “did you kiss her?” “Well yeah of course”. The place fucking erupted. From then on, I would occasionally ask him “how’s my ass taste”, to which he would rely, being the good sport that he is, “same as usual.” You must watch Jackass 2 where all his buds shave their crotches and asses and glue him a beard out of them for a skit, Even crabs in the hair. Fukin funny as shitI hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #6 January 2, 2007 That there's funny shit! I don't care who you are! Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TrophyHusband 0 #7 January 2, 2007 [replyYou must watch Jackass 2 where all his buds shave their crotches and asses and glue him a beard out of them for a skit, Even crabs in the hair. Fukin funny as shit i was laughing my ass off when he kept getting hair in his mouth. he started throwing up when they told him. that was almost as gross as the horse semen scene. "Your scrotum is quite nice" - Skymama www.kjandmegan.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites