€1095!!!

[bertusgeert 1]

I arrived in Grenoble and met Marine who waited for me after my delay. She took me home on the tram, and soon the landlord arrived. We arranged some paperwork and had dinner and good conversation.

The next day Marine was going off to work while I would go to the bank and insurance agency, and return before she finished work. Thus she left the only key for me to take, with no one else being home due to it being a couple of days after Christmas. So I grabbed the keys off the table and went about my business for the day, having to return at 19h00 to meet the landlord once more.

I arrived back at our apartment block right after dark, and when I reached for the keys to open the door I realized I had made a big mistake. I did not have the aparment keys in my hand, but the keys to Marine's broken car. How this happened I did not know. So I started pondering my options...

I did not know whether the landlord owned all three buildings, the single building or just our apartment. (The latter ended up being true). I walked around the building inspecting different routes of ascent, seeing that Marine had left the huge window open, and thus also the door to the kitchen where she smoked when she wasn't supposed to. I decided not to try to climb - which would have been easy - but did not want to be caught halfway up to the 4th floor when the landlord pulled into the parking lot. After all, surely the landlord would have a master key?Well, as it turns out, the latter ended up being very un-true.

Mr. Landlord arrived an hour later to find me waiting outside. I explained to him in bad french what had happened, and he calls his wife. Nope, neither he nor she had a key and explained that we will have to call the locksmith. We signed papers and I gave him my €1000 deposit and first months rent while we waited. The locksmith called 3 times to find us due to his own incapability of reading a map. We ended up going to fetch him at the local pizza shop.

And so, the 19 year old locksmith tried to open the door with a piece of stiff plastic and I could tell from the start it would not work. I mentioned to the landlord that I could try to climb, but of course, he did not like the idea. We waited for 15 minutes while the little locksmith struggled and failed time after time. He soon gave up and said something in french, pulled out his book and wrote a receipt. Now I'm thinking, €20 would be a lot and €40 would be crazy. He gave me the receipt and what did it say? €95!!! What could I do, but try to protest in broken english and french, and have these two idiots explain to me that in THIS COUNTRY, you pay for the time he tried to open the door. It was then my turn to give up on trying to explain to him that in THIS COUNTRY locksmiths need to learn how to read maps!

So now the landlord proposed that Marine and I check into a hotel for the next three days while we wait for one of the other roommates to mail a key. I told him once more (in futility) I could climb the building.

We drove to the fishmarket where Marine works, and she, tired after a day's work, explained that she is NOT checking into a hotel. So off goes me and the landlord looking for a ladder. Of course, at that time of night, the search resulted in nothing.

At this point I saw no other option but to keep trying to explain to the landlord that it is easy to climb the building - especially since I have been climbing for a long time. Seeing no other options he began to consider it, but still disagreed. In order to convince him I told him that I competed in the Australian Nationals; but did not know how to say "17th" in french. So all of a sudden he thinks I won the Nationals. I didn't dare bet my chances in order to maintain honesty, and in a minute he was on the phone again. We went to the apartment and waited for 20 minutes for his wife to arrive with their neighbor's climbing equipment.

She opened the car door and the back seat was FILLED with Rescue Ropes, Full body Harnesses, Carabiners, Slings and straps galore. It was at this point in time that the landlord told me that he is good friends with the upstairs neighbors and we could simply rappel out of their window - EVEN EASIER THAN CLIMBING!!!

So we go upstairs, and I throw on a harness, jump out of the window and get into our apartment in less than a minute. 4 hours after I should have climbed in, with my wallet being €1095 euros lighter. I never want to see this guy again.

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As jy dom is moet jy bloei!

[bob.dino 1]

Ouch. Where did the extra €1000 come from?