30 Lines to make you smile

[lilDevil 2]

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!
4. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
5. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
6. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
7. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
10. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing.
11. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
13. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
14. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
15. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
16. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
17. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
18. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
19. Procrastinate Now!
20. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
21.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
22.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance
23.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
24..They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken.
25..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
26..A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand
times the memory.
27..Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
28.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
29.. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.
30.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

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" Cant keep a good woman down "
Angels have wings, but devils can fly !

[cocheese 0]

31. Sometimes angels are really just lil devils.

[lilDevil 2]

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31. Sometimes angels are really just lil devils.

Even Angels get horny

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" Cant keep a good woman down "
Angels have wings, but devils can fly !

[cocheese 0]

Good one !! love ya for that.

[lilDevil 2]

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Good one !! love ya for that.

Awwww someone loves me other than my dog

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" Cant keep a good woman down "
Angels have wings, but devils can fly !

[Squeak 17]

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Good one !! love ya for that.

Awwww someone loves me other than my dog

I'm currently goin through your draws, whilst you're messing with your dog Geez your place is meesy

You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky)
My Life ROCKS!
How's yours doing?

[popsjumper 2]

32. Reality is what happens when you stop dreaming.
33. Your reality and mine are quite different.
34. Stupidity relieves you of the responsiblity of thinking.
35. Popsjumper can still get it up.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[lilDevil 2]

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Good one !! love ya for that.

Awwww someone loves me other than my dog

I'm currently goin through your draws, whilst you're messing with your dog Geez your place is meesy

OMG now everyone knows youve been rootin in my draws

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" Cant keep a good woman down "
Angels have wings, but devils can fly !

[BIGUN 1,488]

Popsjumper can still get it up.

We could miss a whole day of jumping waiting on that to happen.

Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard.