ryoder 1,590 #51 July 6, 2007 Quote HEY... It's not MY fault some man lost control of his bowels and took a crap in my bed... Geez... I guess SHIT HAPPENS. OK, I've heard of someone being so good in bed that they make the earth move for their partner, but I never heard of them making their partners bowels move.BTW Regarding that my-tree-or-yours thing, I think I'll insist on it being my tree."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TypicalFish 0 #52 July 6, 2007 Quote If it's anything like what you sent the last time, OH HELL YEAH!! I'll take it!! That was just for starters, babe... I TOLD you I take requests... From you anyways... "I gargle no man's balls..." ussfpa on SOCNET Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #53 July 6, 2007 QuoteQuoteA numbers thing? What do you mean? Probabilities, perhaps? Yar!Divot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #54 July 7, 2007 Quote Dude! I dont know where you come up with this shit but its fucking funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Here's one from another anonymous donor.(some details deleted to protect the guilty) Walt Quote I was living in dorms. A friend's wife calls me up and says her daughter was in town for the week and asked me if I would spend some time with her because they didn't really know too many other younger people. Well, it was superbowl sunday and I only had a bunch of drinking planned so I accepted and went over to pick her up. (Yes she was 18+.) Well we finally ended up back in the dorms and one thing lead to another and we began doing it. Something had triggered in my mind that she was a little off kilter when she asked if I wanted to get married after she had finished licking my balls but hey I just had my balls licked so I said said not really but that didn't mean she had to stop what she was doing. Well, things kept going well and the sexual fun lasted deep into the 3rd quarter of the superbowl. By this time we had transitioned to other positions where she was riding me and facing my feet, as I was laying on the bed watching the game out of the corner of my eye. Things got really tight for a second there and then I figured out what she was doing. Yup, it was the big "A". I was beginning to think that this was the beginning of a beautiful relationship ( of me and her ass) but she turned her head around and said one of the most profound things I have ever heard "I can control the clouds with my mind..." I about shit the bed upon the realiziation that I had my dick in the rectum of a crazy chick but with my sphincter being young and tight I was able to maintain. So needless to say I quickly finished up what was going on got showered and ushered her back to her parents house, and made it back to see the end of the game. Apparantly she never let on because her parents were still cool with me afterwards. I guess they knew she was a little off kilter too. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #55 July 7, 2007 Walt you need to publish a bookDivot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #56 July 7, 2007 Quote Walt you need to publish a book He claims he's working on one. I'll believe it when I see it. Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #57 July 7, 2007 Hrm...will it be a scratch and sniff book? ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #58 July 7, 2007 Quote Hrm...will it be a scratch and sniff book? Like the one for that movie... hairspray, wasn't it? Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #59 July 7, 2007 Ewww I hope notDivot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #60 July 7, 2007 Quote Hrm...will it be a scratch and sniff book? I hope not.Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #61 July 7, 2007 Quote Walt you need to publish a book I seem to have a knack for running into some interesting people for sure.Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1969912 0 #62 July 7, 2007 I bet Reese Witherspoon would never poo in the bed. "Once we got to the point where twenty/something's needed a place on the corner that changed the oil in their cars we were doomed . . ." -NickDG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #63 July 7, 2007 Quote Quote Walt you need to publish a book I seem to have a knack for running into some interesting people for sure.Walt Like meeee???? Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #64 July 7, 2007 Quote Quote Quote Walt you need to publish a book I seem to have a knack for running into some interesting people for sure.Walt Like meeee???? I dunno. Got any good turd stories?Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyinchicken 0 #65 July 7, 2007 OH man I'm dying. "Diligent observation leads to pure abstraction". Lari Pittman Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #66 July 7, 2007 Quote Quote Quote Quote Walt you need to publish a book I seem to have a knack for running into some interesting people for sure.Walt Like meeee???? I dunno. Got any good turd stories?Walt Umm...no. Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BIGUN 1,424 #67 July 7, 2007 Army buddy and his girlfriend are getting after it with some serious foreplay. They're in 69 with her on top, his tongue is knee deep in her hoohah and she explodes in orgasm. At that exact secoond, she drops a turd on his forehead They stopped dating shortly afterwards.Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #68 July 7, 2007 Quote Army buddy and his girlfriend are getting after it with some serious foreplay. They're in 69 with her on top, his tongue is knee deep in her hoohah and she explodes in orgasm. At that exact secoond, she drops a turd on his forehead They stopped dating shortly afterwards. I'm soooooooooooooooo glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that. I would have sprayed it all over my monitor!Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #69 July 7, 2007 Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skysprite 0 #70 July 7, 2007 It's the visual! I can just see him going cross-eyed trying to see wtf she just left for him before the realization sinks in! ~skysprite Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #71 July 7, 2007 Quote Army buddy and his girlfriend are getting after it with some serious foreplay. They're in 69 with her on top, his tongue is knee deep in her hoohah and she explodes in orgasm. At that exact secoond, she drops a turd on his forehead They stopped dating shortly afterwards. I just wasted some really expensive alcohol.Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sharimcm 0 #72 July 7, 2007 Dude... I was going to post the same story... Oh well. I guess that's what I get for taking a late night trip to the dz for some free food. "I had a dude tip his black cowboy hat to me after I provided him with a condom outside my hotel room at 3-something in the morning." -myself Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BIGUN 1,424 #73 July 7, 2007 Quote Army buddy and his girlfriend are getting after it with some serious foreplay.... Unfortunately, now that I've told you the story... If you should ever find yourself in a similar position; you'll always wonder if.... I needed hypnotherapy to remove the burning image from my mind. Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
