stitch 0 #26 July 11, 2007 Quote Personal ads are better than meeting people on dzcom. "No cookies for you"- GFD "I don't think I like the sound of that" ~ MB65 Don't be a "Racer Hater" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #27 July 11, 2007 "Yes", I thought, "this is my path to being a total chick magnet!" Suddenly, I was envisioning myself surrounded by gorgeous, intelligent, wonderful women who would treat me like a god! And for the bargain price of $9.95 plus shipping and handling?!!!!! Sign me up!!!! "How to be Outrageously Successful with the Opposite Sex" was the book and it was going to turn me into Walt, the irresistable god of luv. No, not "love". Luv. That's "love" pronounced pimp style! My days of being awkward, shy, and a social leper were over. Ladies, here comes the Walt man. The day that look arrived I just *knew* that I would look back on getting this book as a life changing experience. This book held the wisdom that all men yearn for--how to get laid any time I want. Woohoooo!!!!! After reading the book cover-to-cover, I had a plan. I now had the power to be irrestible to women and all it would take was a simple, but brilliant personals ad. Drum roll and fanfare, please. -------------------------------------- Mr. Wrong (personals voicemail box #) -------------------------------------- While waiting the day or two for the ad to appear in the local newspaper, I pondered how I was going to handle the throngs of women practically begging to spend time with me--even just a few fleeting, exquisite moments of passion and wonder. "Sorry, my social calendar is full for the next 3 years. Shall I put you on the waiting list?" The day the ad was printed, I knew had struck gold. How? I heard people at work talking about the ad! No kidding. They were discussing the latest personal ads and wondering who this mysterious "Mr. Wrong" was. Little did they know . That evening I checked the voicemails. There were no less than seven messages! Yes!!!!!!!!!! Message 1: With what sounded like an army of screaming kids in the background a woman explained that she had dated several versions of me and was ready for another go-round. (Hmmmmmmmmmmm....not what I had in mind--I'm gonna skip this one.) Message 2: An obviously highly-intoxicated woman was mumbling something about wanting to get together. (Promising for sure, but nah--I'll skip this one too.) There were more messages in a similar vein but then came one from a guy. A guy?!!! WTF is a guy doing answering my brilliant ad?!!!!! Doesn't he realize that I am Walt, the god of luv?!!!!! Women only, please. [In a slightly deranged-sounding voice] "Mr. Wrong, huh? Well, Mr. Wrong, if you're into what I *think* you're into, then we ought to get together!" Did I call to find out what he was into? Oh hell NO!!!!! There were more responses, but eventually even I, Walt, the god of luv, had to admit that maybe I needed to change plans.... Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyinchicken 0 #28 July 11, 2007 Quotei guess, i'm to the point where i dont really care no more for having to have a GF around. Everytime I say something to that effect.....wham I meet someone amazing. Watch out. "Diligent observation leads to pure abstraction". Lari Pittman Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,095 #29 July 11, 2007 >We have a second female physician on here now? There's a lot more than two. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lilDevil 2 #30 July 11, 2007 You could always try RSVP.com ``````````````````````````````````` " Cant keep a good woman down " Angels have wings, but devils can fly ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aprilcat 0 #31 July 12, 2007 ...Am not looking for sex in any manner, but am human and appreciate a little eye candy on your part from time to time. Yes I am a terrible sinner in a tormenting spiritual battle with the evil forces of Satan right now, so could use a strong Christian sidekick. No, that was not meant to be funny.... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~` Sidekick? She needs an exorcist (and probably some good strong sex, but not at the same time!)~~April Camelot II, the Electric Boogaloo! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #32 July 12, 2007 I gotta call bullshit here. You say it has never "really crossed your mind" yet you read personal ads I think you're really looking for affirmation, so here it is. If you're tempted go for it. Personal ads aren't as taboo as they used to be. Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #33 July 12, 2007 Quote Quote i guess, i'm to the point where i dont really care no more for having to have a GF around. Everytime I say something to that effect.....wham I meet someone amazing. Watch out. dare to have a date with me!? actually, i had quite a couple of dates lately, but nothing really i'd go for. but at least i'm going out again after years of hermitage..“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #34 July 12, 2007 Quote I gotta call bullshit here. You say it has never "really crossed your mind" yet you read personal ads Crazy I think you're really looking for affirmation, so here it is. If you're tempted go for it. Personal ads aren't as taboo as they used to be. Hrm, i think i'll stick with stalking a certain homo hottie. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #35 July 13, 2007 Do you Really stalk me? I would be so proud to have my very own stalker Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #36 July 13, 2007 Quote Do you Really stalk me? yes ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #37 July 13, 2007 Quote Quote Do you Really stalk me? yes Sweet Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
