Hey Gang If I Should Suddenly Go Missing...

[ACMESkydiver 0]

-My psycho exboyfriend just tried to contact me on MySpace. We dated in highschool, he admitted to obsessing, there was abuse, it all went to shit, I left and never told him how to get ahold of me.

My profile is set to private, and I don't have my name listed in a search...so the only way to find me is to know somebody that already has me as a friend. He sent me this message asking, "Is this Jen? Do you like monkeys?" -I couldn't figure it out until I checked on a friend of mine's MySpace to see if there was any personal info about me on there that he could have gotten, and saw that her quote is "Monkeys are funny".

Ok so psycho stalker found me through my friend...and lives not 30 miles from me. Joe said not to answer the message back at all, and I thought that was the best idea.

I looked at his MySpace profile (because hey, people can change in 20 years, right?) uh, wrong. He has a photo album on myspace...it's STILL about high school. He still has pictures of me from 20 years ago in one of his photo albums...jeezus. His whole life seems to be lived around the same shit we did in high school. He's 35 and married with 2 kids...but mentally he's still that 18 year old crazy.

Joe says this is no good...why would a married guy be contacting an exgirlfriend from highschool that he was obsessing about, and STILL has pictures of, if he wasn't still obsessing. He said the guy is still nuts and to not reply. I'm all for that, but...

What would you do? My MySpace is private, but it gives my city and state (well, close anyway...I don't list the town I live in, just the next one over).

I don't need to start looking over my shoulder again. That fucking SUCKED. I can handle myself, and I know for damn sure he wouldn't be any match for Joe, but the kids...I'm kinda worried.

My mom always said if anything ever happened to me, she'd know who to send the cops to...

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[gonzalesna 0]

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-My psycho exboyfriend just tried to contact me on MySpace. We dated in highschool, he admitted to obsessing, there was abuse, it all went to shit, I left and never told him how to get ahold of me.

My profile is set to private, and I don't have my name listed in a search...so the only way to find me is to know somebody that already has me as a friend. He sent me this message asking, "Is this Jen? Do you like monkeys?" -I couldn't figure it out until I checked on a friend of mine's MySpace to see if there was any personal info about me on there that he could have gotten, and saw that her quote is "Monkeys are funny".

Ok so psycho stalker found me through my friend...and lives not 30 miles from me. Joe said not to answer the message back at all, and I thought that was the best idea.

I looked at his MySpace profile (because hey, people can change in 20 years, right?) uh, wrong. He has a photo album on myspace...it's STILL about high school. He still has pictures of me from 20 years ago in one of his photo albums...jeezus. His whole life seems to be lived around the same shit we did in high school. He's 35 and married with 2 kids...but mentally he's still that 18 year old crazy.

Joe says this is no good...why would a married guy be contacting an exgirlfriend from highschool that he was obsessing about, and STILL has pictures of, if he wasn't still obsessing. He said the guy is still nuts and to not reply. I'm all for that, but...

What would you do? My MySpace is private, but it gives my city and state (well, close anyway...I don't list the town I live in, just the next one over).

I don't need to start looking over my shoulder again. That fucking SUCKED. I can handle myself, and I know for damn sure he wouldn't be any match for Joe, but the kids...I'm kinda worried.

My mom always said if anything ever happened to me, she'd know who to send the cops to...

Tell him you're a lesbian now, that you hate all men, and have an inane disire to remove the male member from all those who carry it.

Some people refrain from beating a dead horse. Personally, I find a myriad of entertainment value when beating it until it becomes a horse-smoothie.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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Tell him you're a lesbian now, that you hate all men, and have an inane disire to remove the male member from all those who carry it.

Right! Because most men find lesbians disgusting! GOOD IDEA!

He had some fantasy about me being 'bi' with my friend that he found my info on from MySpace. I kinda don't think I should fuel that fire any more.

The guy is just sick, sick...

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[gonzalesna 0]

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Tell him you're a lesbian now, that you hate all men, and have an inane disire to remove the male member from all those who carry it.

Right! Because most men find lesbians disgusting! GOOD IDEA!

He had some fantasy about me being 'bi' with my friend that he found my info on from MySpace. I kinda don't think I should fuel that fire any more.

The guy is just sick, sick...

Tell him you're a feminist... all men hate that.

Some people refrain from beating a dead horse. Personally, I find a myriad of entertainment value when beating it until it becomes a horse-smoothie.

[Muenkel 0]

Ignore! Ignore! Ignore!

And if you can pull off a fake obituary, have it published in his local paper.

Better yet, I'll kidnap you first. We'll be having foliage in New England in a few weeks. It would make for a nice vacation; especially if you're jumping during foliage.

_________________________________________
Chris

[AggieDave 6]

Keep a written log of all attempts to contact. The date, time, method and message. If for some reason its in person, write down his demeanor and what he was wearing, what he was driving, etc.

The written log is very important if you end up wanting to file any sort of harassment charges, depending on how your state's laws are written. Typically, though, across the US due to the nature of this sort of crime a pattern really needs to be established.

Now go do an ego search on google (search your own name, variations of which, nick names and online names). See if any real info pops up about you. If it does, take steps to make sure that it changes. It'll take a while for google to catch up with the changes you make else where, but it'll fix its self in a month or two.

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[simplyputsi 0]

Don't reply, possibly delete your myspace and make a whole new one.

Sorry you have a psycho contacting you. Oh and I wouldn't even list a state that I live in, or put a fake one farthest away from you.

Skymama's #2 stalker -

[shropshire 0]

and suggest that your freind changes her's.

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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Keep a written log of all attempts to contact. The date, time, method and message. If for some reason its in person, write down his demeanor and what he was wearing, what he was driving, etc.

The written log is very important if you end up wanting to file any sort of harassment charges, depending on how your state's laws are written. Typically, though, across the US due to the nature of this sort of crime a pattern really needs to be established.

Now go do an ego search on google (search your own name, variations of which, nick names and online names). See if any real info pops up about you. If it does, take steps to make sure that it changes. It'll take a while for google to catch up with the changes you make else where, but it'll fix its self in a month or two.

Ok I'll get to work on that, thanks...

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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Ignore! Ignore! Ignore!

And if you can pull off a fake obituary, have it published in his local paper.

Better yet, I'll kidnap you first. We'll be having foliage in New England in a few weeks. It would make for a nice vacation; especially if you're jumping during foliage.

Sounds beautiful!!! I wish I could.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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Don't reply, possibly delete your myspace and make a whole new one.

Sorry you have a psycho contacting you. Oh and I wouldn't even list a state that I live in, or put a fake one farthest away from you.

The damage is done; he now knows within about 15 square miles where I live. -And we can't move until next year at the earliest...

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[BIGUN 1,443]

You should listen to Joe and AggieDave.
You should also consider getting rid of your MySpace account

Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard.

[Muenkel 0]

What Bigun said. Good advice there.

_________________________________________
Chris

[turtlespeed 226]

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Tell him you're a lesbian now, that you hate all men, and have an inane disire to remove the male member from all those who carry it.

Right! Because most men find lesbians disgusting! GOOD IDEA!

He had some fantasy about me being 'bi' with my friend that he found my info on from MySpace. I kinda don't think I should fuel that fire any more.

The guy is just sick, sick...

. . .'specially the red headded ones.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[dbattman 0]

Get a restraining order. Some people just don't listen to reason. They only work if the other person follows them, but this way you can have him locked up right away if he doesn't leave you alone.

[airtwardo 7]

Tell me more about the Monkey thing!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[peregrinerose 0]

Take a deep breath, relax. You haven't seen this guy in 20 years. His myspace page may be a little weird, but that doesn't mean much. You aren't the same person now as 20 years ago, neither is he.

Clearly, he already knows who you are on myspace... email him back saying that you left the past in the past, you have no interest in talking with him now or in the future, wish him well and let it go.

There's no point getting this worked up over one message... give the guy the benefit of the doubt to some degree. If he persues contact with you after you tell him to leave him alone, then be more concerned.

Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda

[goofyjumper 0]

Reason number 500000 not to get a myspace account!

-----------------
I love and Miss you so much Honey!
Orfun #3 ~ Darla

[simplyputsi 0]

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Take a deep breath, relax. You haven't seen this guy in 20 years. His myspace page may be a little weird, but that doesn't mean much. You aren't the same person now as 20 years ago, neither is he.

Clearly, he already knows who you are on myspace... email him back saying that you left the past in the past, you have no interest in talking with him now or in the future, wish him well and let it go.

There's no point getting this worked up over one message... give the guy the benefit of the doubt to some degree. If he persues contact with you after you tell him to leave him alone, then be more concerned.

I have to disagree with you. If he is not exactly a good guy he will take the return of communication as a hey she talked to me. Not returning the message should be enough for him to get the hint. He may try again and she should ignore it again. If it persists she should report it to myspace.

Skymama's #2 stalker -

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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Get a restraining order. Some people just don't listen to reason. They only work if the other person follows them, but this way you can have him locked up right away if he doesn't leave you alone.

I have no reason to from an emailed 'Hi'.

I will if there's any true harasasment in the future.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[peregrinerose 0]

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I have to disagree with you. If he is not exactly a good guy he will take the return of communication as a hey she talked to me. Not returning the message should be enough for him to get the hint. He may try again and she should ignore it again. If it persists she should report it to myspace.

I'm not a big believer in 'hints'. If she ignores it, he may think he found the wrong person, she didn't get the message, etc. and may try to contact her another way. If she flat out says 'leave me alone' the message is clear, and if he does try to contact her again, she has documentation that she told him to leave her alone and that he continued. I agree that if he contacts her again after being told to leave her alone, report him to myspace and the local authorities, possibly persue a restraining order.

No one knows if he's a bad guy or not... it's been 20 years.

Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda

[Bolas 5]

Then again, if she doesn't respond, he may try again and again. Something like this just recently happened with a friend of mine. He got her #, and called her. She didn't get the message for a few days and he called again and again thinking he was being ignored. SHe had to change her # and email.

I know you think the dude was psycho, but at least give him a reply with a polite brush off. Log it in the journal you plan on keeping. It may actually help if it goes so far as a restraining order or police intervention. I can see them asking "So did you ever tell him to leave you alone?"

Let him know where he stands, don't let him guess.

Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting
If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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Take a deep breath, relax. You haven't seen this guy in 20 years. His myspace page may be a little weird, but that doesn't mean much. You aren't the same person now as 20 years ago, neither is he.

Clearly, he already knows who you are on myspace... email him back saying that you left the past in the past, you have no interest in talking with him now or in the future, wish him well and let it go.

There's no point getting this worked up over one message... give the guy the benefit of the doubt to some degree. If he persues contact with you after you tell him to leave him alone, then be more concerned.

I was trying to take that opinion, but there was a level of sick abuse occurring throughout that relationship that I must take into account when dealing with this person.

I'm not going into details, but everything about this man is just wrong and obscene. His family were just the most twisted, drunken, lude f*ck ups you could imagine and he fit RIGHT in.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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I know you think the dude was psycho, but at least give him a reply with a polite brush off. Log it in the journal you plan on keeping. It may actually help if it goes so far as a restraining order or police intervention. I can see them asking "So did you ever tell him to leave you alone?"

Let him know where he stands, don't let him guess.

I guess that's true.

I'll ignore this first message. If he ever sends me another one or tries to find me some other way, that's when I'll tell him 'thanks but don't contact me any more'.

I hope it doesn't go that far. I know contacting high school buddies is the thing on MySpace...but I can't imagine that he would think it would EVER be ok to contact me again.

God says to forgive him and I did...but I will NEVER forget.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[peregrinerose 0]

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I hope it doesn't go that far. I know contacting high school buddies is the thing on MySpace...but I can't imagine that he would think it would EVER be ok to contact me again.

People can be stupid, lie to themselves about what they do to other people, assume that the pain that they caused in the past is forgotten.

I'm sorry that you had to go through such a shitty relationship and that this is bringing up a lot of nasty memories At least you post here a lot, so all of us would notice if you were gone for very long

Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda