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BillyVance

Smart ass drivers

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The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's traffic school. YIKES!

Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.

Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."

Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
A: Always wear a condom.

Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.

Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too shit-faced to find your keys.

Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.

Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.

Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.

Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be a dickhead all day long.
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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No captions! Not cool! >:(

;)



Oh, hell! Forgot about that. I just tried to find a copy of the script, but w/o success.[:/]
"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

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No captions! Not cool! >:(

;)



Oh, hell! Forgot about that. I just tried to find a copy of the script, but w/o success.[:/]


Don't kill yourself over it, the striking hollywood writers may have burned them. :D
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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First 4 minutes are typical wrong answers to the information sheet.

Weight: Well now this is a relative question. If I were in space I would be weightless...
Etc etc.

Starting at 4:09 when he sits down to take the written test.
Psssssssst
What does a yellow light mean?
Slow down.

Ok........ What does a yellow light mean?
SLOW DOWN.

OK!......What does a yellow light mean?

What does a yellow light mean?
Oh for crying out loud!

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