Why Men don't write advice columns

[BillyVance 35]

Dear Shane:

I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a mile down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbor lady making mad passionate love to her.
I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he went into the back yard and heard a lady scream, had come to her rescue but found her unconscious. He'd carried the woman back to our house, laid her in bed, and began CPR. When she awoke she immediately began thanking him and kissing him, and he was attempting to break free when I came back. But when I asked him why neither of them had any clothes on, he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the past six months.
I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get through to him anymore.
Can you please help me with my problem?
Sincerely,
Mrs. Sheila Usk


Dear Sheila:
A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold.
If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.
I hope this helps.

Shane

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[gonzalesna 1]

Some people refrain from beating a dead horse. Personally, I find a myriad of entertainment value when beating it until it becomes a horse-smoothie.

[lippy 918]

I needed a laugh right now, thanks you deaf bastard!

I got nuthin

[Richards 0]

I don't see the problem? He sounds knowledgable in automechanics and gave sound advice.

My biggest handicap is that sometimes the hole in the front of my head operates a tad bit faster than the grey matter contained within.

[2fat2fly 0]

Well, for one-she was getting carburetion advice whe it seems she was having an injection problem

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[turtlespeed 226]

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Well, for one-she was getting carburetion advice whe it seems she was having an injection problem

Perhaps she could work on a litle alternator with the neighbor lady.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[2fat2fly 0]

Set up a little multi-port injection?

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[ZeG 0]

Oh my god, please don´t post jokes while I am in the office. All the colleagues just turned around to see why I had a laughing fit..

[turtlespeed 226]

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Set up a little multi-port injection?

You never know - her exhaust system might need a thorough cleaning out.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[BillyVance 35]

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Oh my god, please don´t post jokes while I am in the office. All the colleagues just turned around to see why I had a laughing fit..

That's what you get for postwhoring at work.

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[BillyVance 35]

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Set up a little multi-port injection?

You never know - her exhaust system might need a thorough cleaning out.

With a stiff wire brush?

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[2fat2fly 0]

Might as well bore it out while you're there

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[cocheese 0]

Could be the ol "banana in the tail pipe" trick.

[2fat2fly 0]

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You never know - her exhaust system might need a thorough cleaning out.

She probably needs to polish his cam more often

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[2fat2fly 0]

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Perhaps she could work on a litle alternator with the neighbor lady.

She should rebuild the top end

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[turtlespeed 226]

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Quote

Perhaps she could work on a litle alternator with the neighbor lady.

She should rebuild the top end

I wonder what would happen if you put a strong additive into the fuel system.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[BillyVance 35]

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Quote

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Perhaps she could work on a litle alternator with the neighbor lady.

She should rebuild the top end

I wonder what would happen if you put a strong additive into the fuel system.

Depends on what type of additive...

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[2fat2fly 0]

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I wonder what would happen if you put a strong additive into the fuel system.

There's a chance that you'll burn the cylinder and have to go get a newer model. Those are usually quicker, but expect your maintenance cost to go way up

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[masterrig 1]

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Set up a little multi-port injection?

You never know - her exhaust system might need a thorough cleaning out.

It really sounds like an intake problem!?


Chuck

[2fat2fly 0]

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It really sounds like an intake problem!?

Or not getting enough vacuum

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried

[Thanatos340 1]

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Set up a little multi-port injection?

Injection is nice, But I would rather be blown.

[turtlespeed 226]

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Quote

Set up a little multi-port injection?

Injection is nice, But I would rather be blown.

I believe she needs a thurough flushing out and all fluids need to be replaced and topped off.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[cocheese 0]

Dude, Pimp my ride.

[turtlespeed 226]

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Dude, Pimp my ride.

Find your own mechanic.

I don't work on your make and model.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[2fat2fly 0]

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I would rather be blown.

That system only works on the test drive

I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried