iluvtofly 0 #1 February 27, 2008 Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins,cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian . "He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks,"Son... what happened last night?" "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?? "His son replies, "Oh THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed,"LEAVE ME ALONE BITCH, I'M MARRIED!!" Broken Coffee Table $239.99 Hot Breakfast $4.20 Two Aspirins $.38 Saying the right thing at the right time......PRICELESS!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #2 February 27, 2008 Always cracks me up every time I read that one. "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #3 February 27, 2008 ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MagicGuy 0 #4 February 27, 2008 That was good!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shermanator 4 #5 February 27, 2008 on that note... I never thought of this before, but in ASL, when one is drunk, are the signs slurred? CLICK HERE! new blog posted 9/21/08 CSA #720 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #6 February 27, 2008 Quote on that note... I never thought of this before, but in ASL, when one is drunk, are the signs slurred? Hell yeah! You should see us sometime when we get drunk! "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #7 February 27, 2008 THAT'S AWESOME!! ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riddler 0 #8 February 27, 2008 QuoteI never thought of this before, but in ASL, when one is drunk, are the signs slurred? My 16-month old speaks in baby-asl. She knows about 100 signs. It's just like how parents understand their kids when they start to talk, even though no-one else does. Same with the sign language - her "pronunciation" with her hands isn't very good, but we know what she's saying.Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
