Rest In Peace, Grandma "with the spa"

[Conundrum 1]

She was my mom's mom, and they had a spa we used to play in when I was a kid. We used "with the spa" to differentiate between my mom's mom and my dad's mom (who passed on Christmas '07 and was "grandma with the kitties"). I remember going over there and eating some of the best food ever. She'd always make us something delicious to eat and she had the best recipes. After having a major heart attack a long time ago, on September 11th, 2001 she had a major stroke which left her in bad shape, but semi-recoverable from. She would never be the same but she could be rehabilitated to be better. Over the years she just got worse, she developed vascular dementia and has many other minor strokes. Eventually she just was withering away (mentally) and became bound to a wheelchair.

About 2 weeks ago it got much worse and she was put on hospice care in their home with a nice hospital bed and plenty of meds to keep her comfortable. Unable to speak, eat, or drink, she just lay there while we took care of her. I went over as much as I could, particularly during the last couple days when it was close. Spent Wednesday night there, went back on Friday, was there all day Sunday, and then back on Monday. We gave her meds every hour to every half hour. Her breathing was very heavily labored and it was so sad. She had nothing to eat or drink for 9 days.

At about 12:15 last night her breathing went from about 40 per minute to not even half that. It was all so fast after that. We gathered around her (my grandpa, all her girls, her son in law, and me) and held her while she slowed her breathing and eventually, took her last breaths at 12:43am.

It was one of the saddest thing I've ever had to do, but I'm glad I could be there to tell her it was "ok" and that I loved her during her last moments. Watching them take her on the gurney and black cover was not fun. We got to stay with her for some time before they got to the house, though.

In the end, she's in a better place now after suffering (so to speak) for so long. She was in no pain but the way she had to live the last several years of her life isn't something anyone deserves. It broke my heart.

Anyway, I just wanted to talk about her and maybe there is some other people who have been by someone's side as they passed away. I dunno. I'm just rambling now.

I will miss you Grandma, with all my heart.

Grandma "with the spa": January 2nd 1939 - August 19th 2008

[Shell666 0]

I'm so sorry for your loss, 'Chelle.

But I'm glad you had the chance to spend some time with her.

Hugs to you.

'Shell

[guppie01 0]

Sorry she had to experience so much pain and leave her family at such a young age.

May you and your family find peace with her passing.

g

"Let's do something romantic this Saturday... how bout we bust out the restraints?"
Raddest Ho this side of Jersey #1 - MISS YOU
OMG, is she okay?

[diablopilot 2]

A hug and thoughts for you, and your family.

You're a very tough woman to have stayed with her through the end.

-jp-

[madhatter 0]

I've been through a similar experience - my grandfather suffered from Alzheimer's for 5 years, coupled to deterioting health, & the last few months were really distressing.
Whilst in the Medics I also spent last moments with some patients that passed away.

Being there to say 'Goodbye' isn't easy, but I like to believe that person is somewhat comforetd by having someone that cares close by - whether it's a conscious emotion, or not.

I'm sorry for your loss & wish you & your family much love & support during this time of grief..

A VERY MERRY UNBIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!
D.S # 125

[LisaH 0]

(( HUG ))

May she rest in peace.

Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

[lawrocket 3]

My condolences.

But thank you for your post, and how the "saddest" thing you've ever done was also the right thing. Things like that give me some perspective.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[livendive 8]

Quote

Anyway, I just wanted to talk about her and maybe there is some other people who have been by someone's side as they passed away. I dunno. I'm just rambling now.

I had to hold a similar vigil two years ago for my grandma, and it's really tough. You did good to stay with her and your other family members, and you all have my condolences.

Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[porpoishead 8]

I sympathize with your loss.

my condolences chelle, and may your grandma rest in peace.

we just laid our grandma to rest on aug 6th. she was also my moms mom, and I loved her very much.

I don't usually do the whole funeral open casket thing. but I attended my grandmas and I could barely keep it together as I placed a pretty flower on her and gave her one last kiss. it was a very emotional and sad day for me.

sorry you lost your grandma too.

if you want a friend feed any animal
Perry Farrell