People in the healthcare field

[sartre 0]

Have you ever been told something by a patient that is really shocking? I have a patient who told me of something terrible he did many years ago. I don't shock easily, but this did shock and repulse me. I am having a hard time putting it aside and not having it affect my interactions with him. I see him several times a week, and even if I transferred him to someone else, I will still have to interact with him. So far, he has no idea that what he told me has affected me. I have no idea why he even thought he should share this information with me.

Has anyone else experienced anything similar, and how did you handle it?

[skydiverbry 0]

I've been shocked to a certain point from pts.,but never so bad it affected how I treated them or interacted with them.
I'm RT in the E.R. and a paramedic,so most of my pepole I see and they're gone.
No long term relations,just alot of frequent flyers.
What role of care giver are you?
Does what he /her say have any legal reprecussion on you or them?

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Growing old is mandatory.Growing up is optional!!

D.S.#13(Dudeist Skdiver)

[sartre 0]

I am a physical therapist in a nursing home, he is there for a short-term physical rehab stay. It's more than just patient-therapist interaction, usually. We wind up helping people in or out of bed, to the toilet,, bringing little snacks, helping with all sorts of needs, whether or not someone is our patient. Typically, if a patient has a call light on, one of us will see if we can help because nursing staff is never enough.

As for the legal ramifications, I don't want to get into details, but what he did was while in another country. And it was many, many years ago.

This doesn't exactly answer your question, I know. Let's just say it presents a moral dilemma in some ways, and I for once, am not sure what the right thing to do would be. Keep in mind this is an elderly, somewhat frail gentleman.

[skydiverbry 0]

I did work in a LTC facility at the begining of my career and did hold some prn position t/o it also so I undrstand the contact involved.
Now, what to do with your feelings toward this guy is the ???
Sounds like you are in a situation of no easy answer.
Contact is a given,so how you deal with that contact will depend on you.
Was what he did a serious moral injustice to the masses,or does it just conflict with your morality?
Consider talking to a Supervisor or better yet a counsoler??
Rememeber,we need to first take care of ourselves in order to provide care to others.
Does it come down to having to resign your position for the sake of yourself??
It's a hard one,especially without knowing what he told you
Bry

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Growing old is mandatory.Growing up is optional!!

D.S.#13(Dudeist Skdiver)

[iambeav2 0]

I've been a CNA/Paramedic/CPhT for years (got the first 2 when I was 18. I know CPhT isn't much...unless you're in home infusion. I get to talk w/ many patients in the comfort of their own home...but the worst was being a CNA at a nursing home. Not all pt's there are vegetized, and I enjoyed talking to some...

One day, I closed shift after I got outta school and was talking to one of my pt's who used to be a Dr. He confided into me about the pt's he let go b/c they wanted to...the pt's that he was good friends with and had shit going on and they were like..."Can we fake something and you kill me" kinda shit. THAT was wierd to me, b/c for one they were his friends...and for 2, he said he lost count...I was a little frieked to say the least.

I've had a few more of those types of stories from other pt's. I just try and forget about it, however hard it may be. Kinda like if I said, HEY, I KILLED SOMEONE TODAY...and if you KNEW me...it'd be hard to let that just "go away". Luckily for my morals and sanity, I forgot the Dr's name and never had the interest of finding out who he was...but the stories still stuck.

Edited b/c I'm an idiot.

...it's not the fact that you don't appreciate what you have until it's gone...it's the fact that you don't appreciate what you have until someone appreciates it for you!

[wildcard451 0]

I can honestly say that nothing shocks me anymore when it comes out of a patient's mouth. Take it in stride. You either deal with it or you let it go. If you don't want to work with him on moral grounds anymore then don't.

The world is full of horrible people. We just get to see more of them than most.

Well, other than cops and judges.

[sartre 0]

Quote

I did work in a LTC facility at the begining of my career and did hold some prn position t/o it also so I undrstand the contact involved.
Now, what to do with your feelings toward this guy is the ???
Sounds like you are in a situation of no easy answer.
Contact is a given,so how you deal with that contact will depend on you.
Was what he did a serious moral injustice to the masses,or does it just conflict with your morality?
Consider talking to a Supervisor or better yet a counsoler??
Rememeber,we need to first take care of ourselves in order to provide care to others.
Does it come down to having to resign your position for the sake of yourself??
It's a hard one,especially without knowing what he told you
Bry

Good points...however, I am not going to resign my position because of this guy. I have always felt that you treat someone because they need the treatment, regardless of what they may or may not have done prior to their contact with you. But, now that I am faced with the situation, I am surprised how difficult I am finding it.

I am curious of those that have worked in an ER situation. I've seen the scenario on tv - someone you know for a fact has just been involved in, say, a murder, comes through the ER....how do you feel about trying to save that life? I always thought it should be cut and dried....you have a duty to help as much as you can, and so be it....no passing judgement and all of that......

And yet, having an opinion on what is right, before ever being confronted personally with the situation, is very different than actually having the situation to deal with head on. Has it ever been a dilemma for anyone?

I am not trying to sound dramatic. I usually take most everything in stride when it comes to dealing with patients. In ten years, this is the first time I've come across these types of feelings towards a patient.....

What I can, and probably will, do, is continue to hide my feelings, treat him politely and respectfully, and try to forget what I know. But is that the right thing to do?

[sartre 0]

Quote

I've been a CNA/Paramedic/CPhT for years (got the first 2 when I was 18. I know CPhT isn't much...unless you're in home infusion. I get to talk w/ many patients in the comfort of their own home...but the worst was being a CNA at a nursing home. Not all pt's there are vegetized, and I enjoyed talking to some...

One day, I closed shift after I got outta school and was talking to one of my pt's who used to be a Dr. He confided into me about the pt's he let go b/c they wanted to...the pt's that he was good friends with and had shit going on and they were like..."Can we fake something and you kill me" kinda shit. THAT was wierd to me, b/c for one they were his friends...and for 2, he said he lost count...I was a little frieked to say the least.

I've had a few more of those types of stories from other pt's. I just try and forget about it, however hard it may be. Kinda like if I said, HEY, I KILLED SOMEONE TODAY...and if you KNEW me...it'd be hard to let that just "go away". Luckily for my morals and sanity, I forgot the Dr's name and never had the interest of finding out who he was...but the stories still stuck.

Edited b/c I'm an idiot.

I think my scenario is different, in that your doc was doing what he thought was humane, and what he knew was in keeping with his patient's wishes.

I wouldn't have any qualms with accepting this man and his actions. I have had many, many patients in their 80's and 90's who have expressed the feeling that they are done, and would like to be left alone to go peacefully. That's a tough one for them and for the docs treating them....sometimes medical science keeps us around longer than we would like.

Every afternoon there is a resident who spends the afternoon crying out for her mommy. She is over 90 years old, and sounds so miserable. I would much rather end my life than to live 2,5, 10 years or more once dementia has set in to that level.

[sartre 0]

Quote

I can honestly say that nothing shocks me anymore when it comes out of a patient's mouth. Take it in stride. You either deal with it or you let it go. If you don't want to work with him on moral grounds anymore then don't.

The world is full of horrible people. We just get to see more of them than most.

Well, other than cops and judges.

Unfortunately, you're right.

[wildcard451 0]

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Quote

I can honestly say that nothing shocks me anymore when it comes out of a patient's mouth. Take it in stride. You either deal with it or you let it go. If you don't want to work with him on moral grounds anymore then don't.

The world is full of horrible people. We just get to see more of them than most.

Well, other than cops and judges.

Unfortunately, you're right.

Another way I handled it was this:

We had a jail unit where I trained. Lovingly called the CrookU.

One of my residents told me once to never ask what they did to get in there. It makes it easier to treat them not knowing they raped and killed two children, etc.

[sartre 0]

Exactly. I wish this man had not shared with me what he did. Some things are better off not being known.

[Skyrad 0]

I've had old people beg me to kill them, worked with abused children. nothing shocks me anymore. I've worked with prisoners in Broadmore secure psychatric hospital and other prisons, rapists, paedophiles and others. Don't ask what they have done, treat them as you would any other patient (just make sure you don't have sharps in reach of them or in your pockets. The best way is to divorce yourself from what your told, do what you have to do then put it away and treat the next patient as though they were the first of the day.

When an author is too meticulous about his style, you may presume that his mind is frivolous and his content flimsy.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca

[stitch 0]

Cocheese is one of your patients now ??

"No cookies for you"- GFD
"I don't think I like the sound of that" ~ MB65
Don't be a "Racer Hater"

[sartre 0]

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I've had old people beg me to kill them, worked with abused children. nothing shocks me anymore. I've worked with prisoners in Broadmore secure psychatric hospital and other prisons, rapists, paedophiles and others. Don't ask what they have done, treat them as you would any other patient (just make sure you don't have sharps in reach of them or in your pockets. The best way is to divorce yourself from what your told, do what you have to do then put it away and treat the next patient as though they were the first of the day.

I think that may be the best advice yet. It's hard when you start taking this stuff home with you. I need to aim for trying to forget he ever shared anything with me.

[jonstark 8]

Did you ever consider that maybe he is totally full of shit and told you a tale just to creep you out?

[sartre 0]

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Did you ever consider that maybe he is totally full of shit and told you a tale just to creep you out?

Of course I considered that. If it had not struck me as authentic, I would have just let it pass. I work with a typical caseload of 16 patients....after more than 10 years, this is the only case that has gotten under my skin. I am seeking insight from others that have dealt with similar situations.....have you?

[peregrinerose 0]

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Did you ever consider that maybe he is totally full of shit and told you a tale just to creep you out?

Of course I considered that. If it had not struck me as authentic, I would have just let it pass. I work with a typical caseload of 16 patients....after more than 10 years, this is the only case that has gotten under my skin. I am seeking insight from others that have dealt with similar situations.....have you?

I've heard some seriously weird shit in the exam room (and I did nursing home eye care for 3 years, so have experience there too). The things to keep in mind in this case... this guy is not the same person now as he was 20 (or whatever) years ago, any more than you are the same person now as you were 20 years ago. People change a LOT with time, so if you look at it as treating/working with a different person than the one he was talking about, that helps. Second thing to keep in mind... if he wasn't remorseful about what happened, he wouldn't have told you about it. Guilt for that many years is a heavy burden to carry. Some people need to eventually share the weight of that load, often not realizing how it will effect the people they share it with.

Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda