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BillyVance

The Medical Profession speaks out

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I've seen this before with a different title, but still funny....

The Medical Profession Speaks out on the Financial Bail-Out Package

The allergists voted to scratch it,
and the dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it,
but the neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve,
and the obstetricians felt they were all laboring under a misconception.

The ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted;
the pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!"
while the pediatricians said, "Oh, Grow up!"

The psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness,
the radiologists could see right through it,
and the surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

The internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow,
and the plastic surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter."

The podiatrists thought it was a step forward,
but the urologists felt the scheme wouldn't hold water.

The anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas;
and the cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

In the end, the proctologists left the decision up to the assholes in Washington.
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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In other news, Wall Street analysts predict Novartis, makers of Ex-Lax and Gas-X, will exceed their projected earnings for the quarter. The news closely followed a debate among quantitative financial analysts who were unable to reach an agreement regarding the cause of the widespread criticism of the financial bailouts being engineered and implemented by Congress. The analysts were nearly equally split between those who felt the most vocal critics were full of shit, and those who felt those most critical of the bailout were talking out of their ass, but were only full of hot air.

Novartis officials could not be reached for comment.
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