pirate dating advice

[happythoughts 0]

With all the pirates in the news, you've got to believe
that there are some of them on Match.com.

Sure, there's somebody for everybody.

Anyway, we could offer some dating tips for pirates.

First, "The Dread Pirate Lewis".
Wrong on so many levels.

Dreads are unkempt and soooo 90s.
Maybe a little bit of care and... "The Light Perm..."

Second, no one fears Lewis.

Plus, accentuate the positives.

"...rugged.
likes the outdoors.
goes sailing every weekend.
loves to travel and meet new people."

[SkyBastard 0]

man seeks pirate girlfriend

must be buxom and enjoy cavorting in the crows nest, frigging in the rigging and humpng in the hammocks.

also making a mess in the mess (but not in the mashed potato, we've all got to eat that)

Dude #320
"Superstitious" is just a polite way of saying "incredibly fucking stupid".
DONK!

[warpedskydiver 0]

Must put the "Gang" back in Gangbang

That's what that plank is for right?

[happythoughts 0]

(woman blinking...) "Eye, Captain, eye. I think it
is in my eye."

[1969912 0]

Handjobs/fingering might hurt.

"Once we got to the point where twenty/something's needed a place on the corner that changed the oil in their cars we were doomed . . ."
-NickDG

[happythoughts 0]

Quote

Handjobs/fingering might hurt.

Attachments... battery-operated attachments as
shown in that great documentary Kentucky Fried Movie.

[1969912 0]

Quote

Quote

Handjobs/fingering might hurt.

Attachments... battery-operated attachments as
shown in that great documentary Kentucky Fried Movie.

ok

"Once we got to the point where twenty/something's needed a place on the corner that changed the oil in their cars we were doomed . . ."
-NickDG

[kbordson 8]

Don't show up wearing more make up and a hat bigger than hers

Bring Rhum.


(that should be all the advice needed.... )