jf951 1 #1 November 22, 2009 recently the girls i've been hooking up with have all decided to ask one little question..."so how many others have there been?" if its the start of a relationship i can understand but IMO if its just a hookup i feel like it should fall under the don't ask don't tell category. now i haven't been with an ungodly amount of girls but i have been with a fair amount, but i still don't know how to answer the question, i figure there are 3 options... truthful, how ever i feel like shes more likely to feel like shes "just another girl" low ball, it so u don't sound like u get around a lot. high ball, it so u sound like a pimpJump more, Bitch less. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thedude325 0 #2 November 22, 2009 How about no answer? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #3 November 22, 2009 IMO, the best thing you can do is lay all your cards on the table. I think this is a legitimate question. It's also a legitimate question to ask if you've always been safe, and THIS you should DEFINITELY answer 100% truthfully. She's probably asking for a lot of reasons.. Maybe she's trying to gauge where she fits into the picture.. Maybe she's trying to decide whether you're "safe" to go bareback with.. Maybe she just wants to know so her own number doesn't seem so outrageously slutty.. Maybe it was just a random question that popped into her head and only became an issue because you wouldn't answer... The worst thing you can do is lie. At some point she is likely to catch you out and with something so personal it could be a serious trust issue (especially if you've already been having condom-less sex..) If you don't have the balls to come clean, then don't lie. Just give her a ball-park figure.. Ie: More than 1, less than 50. As with all difficult questions.. It's not the answer itself that usually puts people off, but the *way* you answer.. If you've had lots of women - own it. She might initially be a bit put off, but at the back of her mind she may also think you're a bit of a catch. You just don't know. And if she rejects you on the basis that you have a past, then honestly, is she really worth it?? What a silly thing to judge someone on.. Seriously, she will feel WAY more self-conscious about her own number, even if it's just 1.. So just tell her. It might actually make her feel relieved that her number is lower. Or indeed she might be thrilled that you're not in a position to judge *her*.."There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
banesanura 1 #4 November 22, 2009 It's 50/50 here... Unless you think you have an open minded mate, most will run astray if the number is too high for their standards... Or you can just not give a fuck and say the number. I consider myself quite honest and at the end of the day I'd rather have someone know the real me opposed to what they want to hear.Best Girl Scout Ever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baksteen 84 #5 November 22, 2009 [affronted] "I'm not keeping score you know!"[/affronted] That'll confuse them... "That formation-stuff in freefall is just fun and games but with an open parachute it's starting to sound like, you know, an extreme sport." ~mom Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #6 November 22, 2009 Well, it's better to be cheeky than to lie, I guess!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wayneflorida 0 #7 November 22, 2009 The real question is-- How am I in bed compared to other girls? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #8 November 22, 2009 Quote Well, it's better to be cheeky than to lie, I guess!! Cheeky Huh? I have some "Cheeky" for you.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #9 November 22, 2009 Quote [affronted] "I'm not keeping score you know!"[/affronted] That'll confuse them... Good answer. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
d_squared431 0 #10 November 22, 2009 I think you should answer the question if it is asked. Both male and females show know what the persons history is. I understand the one night or weekend hook up but both people should be grown up enough to discuss this and be truthful about it.TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1 I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nerdgirl 0 #11 November 22, 2009 Quote recently the girls i've been hooking up with have all decided to ask one little question..."so how many others have there been?" I don’t do “hook-ups” … I’m old & boring … but in a hypothetical situation like that I would reply with a 4th option: “Why do you want to know? Does it matter?” /Marg Act as if everything you do matters, while laughing at yourself for thinking anything you do matters. Tibetan Buddhist saying Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #12 November 22, 2009 Just tell them how many relationships you've been in... Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #13 November 22, 2009 Quote I don’t do “hook-ups” … I’m old & boring … but in a hypothetical situation like that I would reply with a 4th option: “Why do you want to know? Does it matter?” /Marg + 1 My thoughts exactly. Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #14 November 22, 2009 Quote Just tell them how many relationships you've been in... Then he'd sound like a virgin. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #15 November 22, 2009 If its just a "hook up", and you both know it, why even ask the question? Since it is a stupid question to begin with, I think any answer is fair game and she'll probably assume you are lying anyway. I'd go with the "pimp" option to remind her she's just another hook up! Maybe that way she won't expect a call the next day! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RastaRicanAir 0 #16 November 22, 2009 QuoteI think you should answer the question if it is asked. Both male and females show know what the persons history is. I understand the one night or weekend hook up but both people should be grown up enough to discuss this and be truthful about it. With the ABSOLUTE LOVE, RESPECT and ADORATION I feel for my #1 Smutsketeer and premiere literary inspiration, I would be agonizingly remiss if I didn't say: YOU ARE SO WRONG RIGHT NOW that it makes my choad hurt. (Likewise to the lovely British bird.) No one REALLY wants to know the answer to this question, no matter how badly they think they do in the hormonally-flushed afterglow of the moment. It doesn't matter what reason man or woman give for asking the question, chances are what they're really asking is: Woman: "Are you as perfect as I would like to make you out to be?" and, Man: "Who am I going to be graded against?" Unless both numbers match within a margin of error of +/- 2, (and if that happens run out and buy a Power Ball ticket immediately!), one party will almost inevitably find a reason to feel insecure, or at least gain a mental weapon to wield unfairly against the other during a future argument. Or, if I may quote the brilliant Dante: "THIRTY-SEVEN??!!!" In a relationship where the respect and trust is real, and both parties are really focusing on each other to the exclusion of anyone else past or present, history should be able to stay safely in the archives. Medical history is a separate matter entirely. Since someone who has had careful contact with 100 people could very well be healthier than someone who was careless with the wrong one, the numbers shouldn't enter into that discussion anyway.OrFunV/LocoBoca Rodriguez/Sonic Grieco/Muff Brother #4411 -"and ladies....messin with Robbie is venturing into territory you cant even imagine!-cuz Robbie is Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon 7 #17 November 22, 2009 QuoteQuoteI think you should answer the question if it is asked. Both male and females show know what the persons history is. I understand the one night or weekend hook up but both people should be grown up enough to discuss this and be truthful about it. With the ABSOLUTE LOVE, RESPECT and ADORATION I feel for my #1 Smutsketeer and premiere literary inspiration, I would be agonizingly remiss if I didn't say: YOU ARE SO WRONG RIGHT NOW that it makes my choad hurt. (Likewise to the lovely British bird.) No one REALLY wants to know the answer to this question, no matter how badly they think they do in the hormonally-flushed afterglow of the moment. It doesn't matter what reason man or woman give for asking the question, chances are what they're really asking is: Woman: "Are you as perfect as I would like to make you out to be?" and, Man: "Who am I going to be graded against?" Unless both numbers match within a margin of error of +/- 2, (and if that happens run out and buy a Power Ball ticket immediately!), one party will almost inevitably find a reason to feel insecure, or at least gain a mental weapon to wield unfairly against the other during a future argument. Or, if I may quote the brilliant Dante: "THIRTY-SEVEN??!!!" In a relationship where the respect and trust is real, and both parties are really focusing on each other to the exclusion of anyone else past or present, history should be able to stay safely in the archives. Medical history is a separate matter entirely. Since someone who has had careful contact with 100 people could very well be healthier than someone who was careless with the wrong one, the numbers shouldn't enter into that discussion anyway. Your numbers... or hers?? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,590 #18 November 22, 2009 Quote recently the girls i've been hooking up with have all decided to ask one little question..."so how many others have there been?" What if you really don't remember?Being a fan of HHGG, I'll just go with "42"."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredivot 0 #19 November 22, 2009 When my wife and I were dating there were several such questions that came up. My answer was always, "Think about it until tomorrow. If you really want to know, ask then and I'll tell you-but be certain you want the answer." She never re-asked a question.You are only as strong as the prey you devour Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #20 November 22, 2009 Sarcasm. You were my first. I've never done anything like this before. Does this mean we hafta get married now? I can't believe Wilt Chamberlin wrote that book. I mean, if I'd been with that few women... I've actually asked in relationships about "time in sport" and "first jump stories" but not numbers. Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #21 November 22, 2009 All I know is no matter the answer, I want it to be truthful. If the guy over or underplays it, it's a lie. I would prefer the guy to either be 100% honest, or give a cheeky/funny response that doesn't actually answer the question. I've asked the question, and the answer I MOST appreciated was the guy who told me he'd pretty much been a big slut, and he hadn't always been careful, but he'd go get tested if it made me feel better and he was prepared to always use protection if it mattered to me. I thought it demonstrated that despite *his* laissez-faire attitude to sex, he was prepared to respect *my* position. I really respected him for it."There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,590 #22 November 22, 2009 Quote ...or give a cheeky/funny response that doesn't actually answer the question. I can do that."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
banesanura 1 #23 November 22, 2009 you can say technically 95 but only 3 of them were human. Then throw in the word kentucky some where and they will understand. Best Girl Scout Ever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #24 November 22, 2009 Quote Being a fan of . . . . , I'll just go with "69". Fixed it for ya. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mutumbo 0 #25 November 22, 2009 Quote you can say technically 95 but only 3 of them werent related to me. Then throw in the word kentucky some where and they will understand. Fixed it again, if your going to go with a place like kentucky you gotta keep it within realm. people dont screw animals there, they screw RELATIVES, if you want animals, you gotta go with tennessee. Thanatos340(on landing rounds)-- Landing procedure: Hand all the way up, Feet and Knees Together and PLF soon as you get bitch slapped by a planet. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
