This explains why Billy has been posting so much these days

[futuredivot 0]

Turtle is passing by Billy's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door he sees Billy doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old John Deere.


Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette.


He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move lets his suspenders fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his corduroy trousers.



Grabbing both sides of his checked shirt he rips it apart to reveal his vest underneath and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap on to a pile of hay.


'What on earth are you doing Billy' says Turtle.


'Jeez Turtle, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me' says an obviously embarrassed Billy, 'but me and the Missus been having some trouble lately in the bedroom department, and the Therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor . "

You are only as strong as the prey you devour

[iluvtofly 0]

I really did not need to read that while eating lunch. Besides...there's one major flaw in that story. Billy would never hear Turtle say anything to him.