Orchid 0 #26 October 11, 2009 Quote I think he found his calling. Yes, he has indeed! What will the peeps in this forum do without him....?! Damn...I should have sticked with community college, I would have been smarter! Dadddd.....................................oh wait, he's dead! "Love is doing small things with great love." Lacrosse: Legally beating men with sticks since 1492 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muff528 3 #27 October 11, 2009 Quote I think he found his calling. I nominate Shah, in addition to giving advice, to be in charge of writing explanations, proclamations, congressional bills and treaties and vcr user manuals. I still laughing. My 12-yo thinks I've finally lost it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #28 October 11, 2009 Quote Quote I think he found his calling. Yes, he has indeed! What will the peeps in this forum do without him....?! Laugh way less... Shah, it's okay because we're laughing at you not with you. Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DavidB 0 #29 October 12, 2009 And the saddest aspect of all this is: We'll NEVER be able to explain to anyone else why this is so damn funny. When the only tool you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kbordson 8 #30 October 13, 2009 Dearest Shah (you being the only Shah that I know) I have this friend. She is REALLY trying hard to get a date with a Skygod, or even just a Skydemigod, but is having a hard time doing so. She's smart, and has a GREAT personality... but she's wondering what else she could do. She was thinking about posting nude pictures on this site to try to help her cause, but she isn't a size 6 nor is she under 35 years old and so doesn't want to offend those with more delicate tastes. What is this poor lonely woman to do? Signed A Caring Friend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #31 October 13, 2009 QuoteDearest Shah (you being the only Shah that I know) I have this friend. She is REALLY trying hard to get a date with a Skygod, or even just a Skydemigod, but is having a hard time doing so. She's smart, and has a GREAT personality... but she's wondering what else she could do. She was thinking about posting nude pictures on this site to try to help her cause, but she isn't a size 6 nor is she under 35 years old and so doesn't want to offend those with more delicate tastes. What is this poor lonely woman to do? Signed A Caring Friend. Dear Caring F, Many a tadpoles have aspired to become lone eagles only to have their dreams squashed when they lost their tale, developed legs that were quickly ripped off and eaten by horny little French men. What that has to do with your friend I have no clue but it does sound like a nice childrens story that should have been bought by Disney and then I could have retired to a nice tropical island where I could have spent my entire life with out having to wear pants! NOW! Per your problem or your friends problem which is now your problem which I will solve using my deep intellect and random buzz words. First buzz word we need to understand is perspective! And who's perspective matter most here is not your friend but rather the Skygod in question. For you see sky gods are a lot like sex therapists but instead of making sweet sweet love to young vulnerable women in need of a cure for their nymphomania and other eating disorders these men who gravity seems to have forgotten make sweet sweet love to the sky! Yes they jump out of all kinds of flying things with a terrified soccer mom strapped to their chest without so much as a care in the world! All the while flexing their tan toned pectoral and glutial muscles and showing off their perfect teeth and on occasion giving their terrified passenger the true skygod experience by slapping their ass and cupping a feel of perky titties! All of which will be captured on film and sold to the victim at an exorbitant cost and commented on relentlessly when published on facebook. And that is to assume that said god among degenerates won't be banging said soccer mom for a small fee later in the evening in a condemned trailer near the DZ that the packers sleep in. All of which will be captured on film and sold to the victim at an exorbitant cost and commented on relentlessly when published on adult friend finder. And now to look at the world via the view of your friend. She's a women well past her prime who is not a size six? There will be much nagging and whining and her perspective should be avoided at all costs! After all I'm sure when compared to all the long legged flat bellied perky boobied sexy assed hotties that our skygod has had the chance to molest what chance does she really have? After all I'm sure she has a nicer personality but sky gods are not captured with such trivial things as personality or even of being of legal age! Big fake titties sure! Maybe a set of stripper twins or the ever popular mother daughter tag team yes please! But personality? Please! What is his last name? It's GOD now isn't it! You don't dare call them sky dudes now do you! But fear not! I can relate to your saggy spongy friend. And thus I have some great advice! For I know it's hard to believe that a man with my charm, taste in good doctors coats and master of the English language has to work hard to get the attention of supremely hot women but I do. First off I highly recommend that your friend takes those nude photos of her self. As a graduate of the Penthouse, Hustler and Swank Institute otherwise known as PH&S I would be more than happy to take some of the photos for her. Next I would highly suggest she post these photos online on as many forums as she can. For Skygods have but one weakness other than cheep women, cheep drinks, cheep food and striking the earth at great speed. And that is that they are always online looking for ways to glorify their own godlike status. So by posting in various forums she is casting a wide net much like her legs in the photos. Eventually the skygod will take notice and will initiate his courtship which will consist of him posting a lengthy post regarding his own exploits to her simply asking how to make jello shots. I also suggest she go bi which for a women isn't a big deal since it's a well known fact that all women suffer from dormant female bisexual nature which can easily be brought out of remission with a few dozen shots of tequila. And the reason I say this is simple. No one woman can ever hope to truly own a sky god, they can only be held on to for only so long before the sky god gets bored. And why make things complicated regarding who was cheating on who in the condemned trailer when it can be a family experience which I can photograph for a very low price. So tell your friend to aim high....after all what could possibly go wrong! And stay sexy Ohio! Dr. SLife through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #32 October 13, 2009 Quote Dear Dr S I ahve had a crush on Lucky McS on DZ for a couple of months- the only thing separating us is the Atlantic-how should i proceed I'm flattered... Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,589 #33 October 13, 2009 Quote My 12-yo thinks I've finally lost it. Well, you could always show your 12-year-old this thread . Nope, didn't think so -- I sure wouldn't. And I'd have to agree with this being Shah's talent. This is some awesome stuff. And I have a question for Shah: There are like 4 women for every man after the age of about 70, so why there are any single men after the age of 70? Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dks13827 3 #34 October 13, 2009 O.P. - obviously you are a responsible, sensible, sensitive, caring man. ( they hate that. ( women )). Think I am wrong ? Look around !! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #35 October 13, 2009 By that age they've finally learned! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rehmwa 2 #36 October 13, 2009 QuoteThere are like 4 women for every man after the age of about 70, so why there are any single men after the age of 70? because there are like 4 women for every man .... but at that age, that's like enough skin for about 7 women ... Driving is a one dimensional activity - a monkey can do it - being proud of your driving abilities is like being proud of being able to put on pants Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #37 October 13, 2009 Funny thread! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #38 October 13, 2009 Quote Dear Dr S I ahve had a crush on Lucky McS on DZ for a couple of months- the only thing separating us is the Atlantic-how should i proceed Mr. Funny name! Made me giggle. Long distance relationships are like low cost fish sticks! You long for them, you yearn for them, you dream of them and you even may ask for them. But then you get them and you quickly realize two things. The fish sticks in front of you don't exactly look like the ones that you see on the box and no fish really comes in stick form so you start to wonder if you are in fact eating fish. That is to say some times ones gets the fish stick they wished for and it's really not the fish stick they wanted but now they have to eat it or they will offend the person who is giving them the fish stick. Solution? Don't eat fish sticks! Don't even ask for them! Just eat corn dogs and you'll be just fine! No one has ever had a bad corn dog! And remember no love glove no lasagna! Dr. SLife through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #39 October 13, 2009 Quote And I have a question for Shah: There are like 4 women for every man after the age of about 70, so why there are any single men after the age of 70? Wendy P. P may I call you #1? #1 as a man of science there are many things in science we do not know nor really care to know. Why do farts smell so bad, what really is in SPAM, what is it about perky boobies that we men really like? But one thing we do know is why women outlive men. The answer simply has to do with women. Yes the reason why men die so young and usually before their wives is simply due to the fact that we men can only take so much and so we do our best to kill our selves using what ever is at hand. Be it smoke, drink, bacon or hot young secretary and Viagra. So the men who do make it to the ripe old age of 70 are either; dead, def, really out of it or gay. Dr. S Th S stands for SUPER!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnDeere 0 #40 October 13, 2009 Quote The answer simply has to do with women. Yes the reason why men die so young and usually before their wives is simply due to the fact that we men can only take so much and so we do our best to kill our selves using what ever is at hand. Nothing opens like a Deere! You ignorant fool! Checks are for workers! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baksteen 84 #41 October 14, 2009 Quote O.P. - obviously you are a responsible, sensible, sensitive, caring man. I've been called a lot of things in my life - but responsible and sensible?I'm a skydiver, remember?"That formation-stuff in freefall is just fun and games but with an open parachute it's starting to sound like, you know, an extreme sport." ~mom Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #42 December 7, 2009 Quote I think he found his calling. Shah, you may find safe haven here... Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #43 December 7, 2009 Quote Shah, you may find safe haven here... Safety isn't want I crave it isn't my natural state. I enjoy a good debate as much as a good glass of whiskey. It makes me a better person, helps me see how others see the world. Nothing ever came from being safe. From never accepting any risk.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #44 December 7, 2009 Quote Nothing ever came from being safe. So the parachute is really only for losers then??! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
banesanura 1 #45 December 7, 2009 Dear Dr. Shah So I started seeing this guy. We've talked about moving "forward" with open labels...etc. We've both discussed being emotionally together, however being open swingers. Since I've never "swinged" , "swong" or "swang" Should I try to swing with him first or should I place the title on him first? Does it really matter? Semi Single Swinger in SouthEastBest Girl Scout Ever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Misternatural 0 #46 December 7, 2009 >So the parachute is really only for losers then??! AHAHAHAHAH! don't you have some porn to watch Beware of the collateralizing and monetization of your desires. D S #3.1415 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #47 December 7, 2009 QuoteDear Dr. Shah So I started seeing this guy. We've talked about moving "forward" with open labels...etc. We've both discussed being emotionally together, however being open swingers. Since I've never "swinged" , "swong" or "swang" Should I try to swing with him first or should I place the title on him first? Does it really matter? Semi Single Swinger in SouthEast Ms. Swing me right round, right round like a record player right round. So let me get this left, you have a friend who you have just met and you two are going at it like two bunnies who just did an 8 ball of Viagra and drooped some E and you are thinking about swinging? The porno part of my brain which fills about 90% of my skull is instructing me to tell you "YES DO IT!" but the remaining part of what is left of my brain is telling me to tell you no. I hate that part of my brain and have tried killing it via large quantities of beer...but it won't die. Here is the situation, swinging is based on understanding and trust. With out understanding and trust swinging can lead to jealousy, anger, fits of buying over priced hand bags and a significant reduction of rabbid bunny love making. Now from the little of your question I read it appears this relationship has just started and the true building boulders of your relationship have yet to be thrown into a pond filled with endangered turtles. Now for some this is enough, and in fact it may be enough to get you into your local swinger bar....that and a valid fake ID. But I would suggest you hold off a little. Swinging can be lots of fun, and not all the guys there are fat sweaty truck drivers with hot stripper wives, some of them are deep sensual cats who know 15 ways to give a girl an orgasm. But for now I suggest, even though the pono side of my skull is about to explode, that you take it easy and go slow. Maybe hit a strip club or two or three....see how that goes and if it goes make sure it comes back. Hope this helped you out Singing Suzy. And this is Dr. S saying No glove no love! This thread is brought to you by http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/6/6d/Nutella.jpg Nutella, if you think it tastes great on bread....wait till you have had it off some nipples!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
labrys 0 #48 December 7, 2009 Quote You see the reason you are feeling "queer" or as the Germans cal it "hasselhoffen" is that you are fighting the flow of nature my good man! I never thought I'd laugh so hard at one of your comments. Owned by Remi #? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #49 April 20, 2010 wait.....can i give advice to my self or is that just talking to my self? Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyrider 0 #50 April 20, 2010 Quote wait.....can i give advice to my self or is that just talking to my self? usually reffered to as masterbation! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
