wmw999 2,588 #1 March 17, 2011 My brother likes to talk about people who don't filter their thoughts before talking; he calls them shit filters. One of his favorite co-workers was a former colonel (service unidentified) who didn't, as he put it, even have a chunk catcher. Said that in a technical meeting once, with some fairly significant people, someone asked him what he was thinking. "I was just wondering. When you're stump-fucking a cow, where do you put the tail? Do ya hold it under your arm, or do you just sling it over your shoulder?" After that, he looked around the meeting, and just said "carry on." I'm not at that level of self-confidence yet Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wildcard451 0 #2 March 17, 2011 Was said col the highest ranking officer in the room? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,588 #3 March 17, 2011 It was a civilian crowd (aviation mfg). But methinks he was sure used to being the highest-ranking officer Wendy P. There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muff528 3 #4 March 17, 2011 I would love to try that at a meeting but down here in Polk County, Florida I would probably get an informed answer and some helpful suggestions to go along it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #5 March 17, 2011 Quote It was a civilian crowd (aviation mfg). But methinks he was sure used to being the highest-ranking officer . OH I FREAKING LOVE THIS GUY! I like working for people like this. It's a good giggle which makes the day just fly by! Who needs HR or PC when you can have a good laugh!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #6 March 17, 2011 Well, I may not like or agree with what someone has to say but I prefer people that say exactly what they think to hyppocrites, liars and back-stabbers. Even if the filterless person is a total douche, at least you know exactly where (s)he stands (and consiquently where you stand). ETA - besides, these people can be tremendously funny!! (Case in point: your example! ) "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #7 March 17, 2011 Quote ETA - besides, these people can be tremendously funny!! (Case in point: your example! ) These are the folks that make HR and the PC folks pass out! And I FOR ONE LOVE IT!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,116 #8 March 17, 2011 Had a friend like that. She was always like that to a degree, then had a traumatic brain injury that intensified it quite a bit. She was a good person inside and thus her mental stream-of-consciousness narrative was more fun to listen to than disturbing. Was a little hard on her boyfriends though. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredivot 0 #9 March 17, 2011 You are only as strong as the prey you devour Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #10 March 17, 2011 I was a senior supervisor, production control when I worked in Aerospace. Being a vampire I chose to work nights, the day shift supervisor was fairly new and didn't like how 'loose' I ran my shift. He would record and transcribe EVERY WORD of my daily pre-shift status meeting then sumerize my 'mistakes' at the bottom, and turn the pages in to the department manager.... stuff like~"Jim talked about 'this' but didn't talk about 'that', he's not running to the priorities day shit is ect." even~ "When addressing his crew, Jim used the A-word 7 times, and the F-word 4 times" Believe it or not, I have a fairly sarcastic sense of humor...so I'd play with him a bit.One time at the beginning of my meeting I said to the guys~ "Strangest thing happened last night, there I am fucking my sister, and she said... You do that just like dad, I told her yeah I know... That's what moms says!" Then went on with the meeting...The story goes that the next morning in the big all department meeting, each manager is going over action items. My department manager says to my nemesis counterpart~ "Reviewing your minutes of Twardo's meeting yesterday I have only one thing to say...This unequivocally proves that Jim truly IS crazy... I know for a fact his sister fucks MUCH better than is mother" I guess 1/2 the room fell outta their chairs laughing! Our department manager liked me since the day I broke up a mahogany row meeting, by saying "There goes 40 bucks" after he let out a massive sneeze during a presentation... ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
millertime24 8 #11 March 17, 2011 EPIC!!!Muff #5048 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #12 March 17, 2011 Quote My brother likes to talk about people who don't filter their thoughts before talking; he calls them shit filters. One of his favorite co-workers was a former colonel (service unidentified) who didn't, as he put it, even have a chunk catcher. Said that in a technical meeting once, with some fairly significant people, someone asked him what he was thinking. "I was just wondering. When you're stump-fucking a cow, where do you put the tail? Do ya hold it under your arm, or do you just sling it over your shoulder?" After that, he looked around the meeting, and just said "carry on." I'm not at that level of self-confidence yet Wendy P. that is such a great line, i think i'll have to steal it.. now i'm wondering, how do you get up to the cows ass!? “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,588 #13 March 17, 2011 Quotehow do you get up to the cows ass!?I believe that's where the (tree) stump comes in. Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #14 March 17, 2011 Quote Quote how do you get up to the cows ass!? I believe that's where the (tree) stump comes in. Wendy P. and how do you make it stay!? with sheep it's fairly easy, put on your rubber boots and place the rear legs in them; so they cant escape! “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,588 #15 March 17, 2011 Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #16 March 17, 2011 Quote Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P. do cows orgasm BTW!?“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
david3 0 #17 March 17, 2011 Quote Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P. so she can't get away...? you’re talking to VB. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #18 March 17, 2011 Quote Quote Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P. so she can't get away...? you’re talking to VB. dude, i dont discriminate by sexes; i take what i can get! “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
david3 0 #19 March 17, 2011 Quote Quote Quote Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P. so she can't get away...? you’re talking to VB. dude, i dont discriminate by sexes; i take what i can get! Keeping your options open, smart man. . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #20 March 17, 2011 Quote Quote Quote Quote Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P. so she can't get away...? you’re talking to VB. dude, i dont discriminate by sexes; i take what i can get! Keeping your options open, smart man. . you get double the selection! “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #21 March 18, 2011 Quote Quote Quote how do you get up to the cows ass!? I believe that's where the (tree) stump comes in. Wendy P. and how do you make it stay!? with sheep it's fairly easy, put on your rubber boots and place the rear legs in them; so they cant escape! No boots? Simply easy 'em toward a cliff, they'll keep trying to 'back-up' which cuts the workload 80%! No cliff? Build a fire! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muff528 3 #22 March 18, 2011 Quote Quote Quote Quote and how do you make it stay!? I guess that either you have to be good enough for the cow to enjoy it , or that's a vote for holding the tail under your arm (so she can't get away easily). Wendy P. so she can't get away...? you’re talking to VB. dude, i dont discriminate by sexes; i take what i can get! ....nor species! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoadRash 0 #23 March 18, 2011 "How would you assess this situation?" "It's a clusterfuck, sir." I love that line!!! ~R+R...Filter, I don't need no stinkin' filter...but I know I have one......I just don't always use it... edit: I can't spell these days... ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Fly the friendly skies...^_^...})ii({...^_~... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BobMoore 0 #24 March 18, 2011 Quotedo cows orgasm BTW!? Do guys really care?"For you see, an airplane is an airplane. A landing area is a landing area. But a dropzone... a dropzone is the people." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riddler 0 #25 March 18, 2011 We have a guy like that at my current job - says whatever comes to mind, and he deals with everyone since he fixes their computers. We call him "Red Light", since we had harassment training, and they used the "green light", "yellow light" and "red light" metaphors. Most of this guy's verbiage falls into the red-light category. We started a new program where we all vote for the biggest contributor to the company every quarter. He was voted as the biggest contributor, and the company is paying for a trip to the Carribbean for him. If I said those things, I would probably get fired.Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
